STORIES
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10/4/2009
So I've been married for 23 years - not many of them happy. My husband is a firefighter. I happened to pick up the movie not really knowing about it or how it would impact me. I actually thought that someone had been watching us and made the movie from it. The only excption - we have three children - and they are the reason I stay in my marriage because I still believe that it's better for them. I've pretty much given up on trying to fix my marriage and live happy as I truly feel that I've tried for years - giving, giving, getting nothing in return. I stopped giving a few years ago and now I just go through the motions and try not to get angry or frustrated knowing that this is the decision I've made. Today I ordered the 40 day dare book - had it shipped to my house in my husbands name. I'm hoping that he will open it and take the dare - more so I'm hoping that I have enough courage to take the dare too. It's taken many years to build the brick wall - excessive drinking, afairs, disrespect and suspition of even more. I'm hardened and hurt and letting go of the anger will be a difficult task for me. I do understand that the only person we can control is ourselves - really needing assistance to help me be able to change what I can - not sure if I'm ready. Will let you know how things progress.
10/4/2009
I have just celebrated my 13th wedding anniversary with the love of my life. We got married young at just 17. We have two beautiful daughters. Until the last 5 months I have been pretty happy with my life. My husband and i have had to fight and claw our way to get what we have, but I have always felt blessed. About 5 months ago i noticed my husband starting to act funny. He would leave the room when a text would come in and started not coming home at all on the weekends. After looking up cell phone records and bank statements I found out he had a female friend that he was talking to all the time. To this day he swears that they are only friends but now she is working with him (we own our own company) and he goes to her house all the time. I am so hurt by this and yet all he can say is he needs time, he swears that there is nothing physical in their relationship, but I think the emotional part is the hardest. I pray all the time for God to give me strength to get through another day. My kids tell me to divorce their dad, but some part of me wants to hold on. The Love Dare is going to be my last effort in my marriage. It is currently 1:15 am and he is still not home. I pray for him to come back to me, but dont know if its what God wants. Does he want someone to be this unhappy with their marriage and partner if the partner does not put time/effort into it? I hope that this works this is the only thing I can think of, he wont go to counseling and we both watched the movie. Please keep us in your prayers.
10/4/2009
My husband and I have been married for two years and have a one year old daughter. Just this June I kicked him out of the house and he went back to his ex wife, I have know once I found out that I want to save our marriage. He relize that he wants to be with me and his daughter so I let him back in our lives and everything is going real good right now. We set done for the first time and watch fireproof tonight and that made us both realize that we want to make everything work out for us. So we are going to start our own love dare and see how everything works out.
So for everyone who is reading please pray for us and I will do the say. I love him with all my heart and I really want this to work out.
Amber
Amber
10/3/2009
Hi, I been Married for about 2 years and together for about 4. Me and my wife have a beutiful 2 year daughter and I also have a 4 year step daughter that i consider my own. Everything at first was great, we met at work, fell in love and moved in together. We were always near each other. every job we have been we have been together. It got to a point that our lives only revolve around my daughters. Me and my wife would not communicate like we use to, I always reminded her that she was not loving enough, and she never showed me any emotion, so i began to wonder if she really loved me or not. well it got to the point that i didnt trust her, because she would not communicate with me, show emotion or told me that she loved me, so i began checking her stuff, emails, txt msgs, phone calls. I have never done this but unfortunatelly i began. My wife has left me, she claims that I didnt trust her, and she got fed up with no trust in our relationship. It has been 3 months since we been separated, we have already talked about divorce, made arrangements as who is going to keep what and what kind of child custody we are going to get. I was beginning to accept this. you see i have always put my wife first, we hardly argue, i was alwasy loving to her (at first) but it slowly began to die out. My cousin mention me about this movie call fireproof and said i should watch it. after watching it, it opened my eyes to a lot of things that it was wrong with me. I called my cousin to ask him why had he mention the movie to me and he said that he did not know, that it was pretty random. so i decided to start this love dare thing, at first i didnt want to because in my mind i had the thought that she is the one that left me, she gave up, however in my heart i want my family back so that way this time we can ground our marriage God's way. I started the love dare and I am on day 4 today. I have seen some changes in me, and she seems to be responding to it. I dont know if this changes from both sides are for good or for worst, but i do know this, I have given it to the lord and he led me down this path. so if you are reading this please pray for me, for i want my family back.
chris
9/29/2009
I have been with my boyfriend for only a 1 year and a half, which really feels more like a 5 year marriage. We moved in together incredibly fast which helps account for the additional time I mentioned. We immediately believed we were soulmates and I truly had the man of my dreams. He sent a diamond necklace across the ocean while I was staying in Hawaii, he would constantly make me extravagant dinners and show me places I had never been. While I still thank God every single day for his love and generosity, we had definitely hit problems most married couples don't hit for years into a marriage. Financial...boredom...spending too much time away....emotional blackmails....you name it we have been through it...already! I knew I was not bound to him and had every reason to walk away but the book is right when you choose to love someone you truly love them regardless of what reasons they give you to do so. I watched as he slowly morphed into this man I had never seen before. I was his punching bag in so many ways. He began to be angry all of the time and everything began to be my fault. As is natural for a woman to do, I blamed myself and began to feel like I wasn't good enough for him. Surprisingly he seemed to feel the same way towards me. I began resenting him and giving the stone cold treatment. I began to shut down in many ways. Finally, I realized that despite what I had invested in us, I was not married and too young to be living like I had no options. So as I began to plot how I would leave, striving for the least confrontational method.... a friend laid the "Love Dare" book in my lap. I glanced through it and read it secretly afraid to be mocked for my "mushy" side. The more I read it, the more it spoke to me and I began to relate our problems to the chapters in the book. It made me realize that I played a lot larger of a role than I thought and that I had unknowingly perpetuated his negative reactions that I despised so much. So I took the dare. I began looking at him again as I had in the beginning. I changed my attitude towards him and began showing him the love that he hadn't seen in months. I decided that the least I could do was be responsible for MY actions and make sure that each and every one of them declared the love I still felt for him, as the book describes. My boyfriend noticed an immediate change in my demeanor and asked what had changed. I described the book in a way I knew he would understand (he is not a believer), he said he liked that book and may look at it some time. Since I have been practicing this attitude at home I have seen him respond in a way only God himself could have done. He is slowly morphing again into the man I always desired. Lately he has had such a curiosity in faith and God, etc. I pray for us daily and have faith that God will show him what being a christian man is all about. This book saved my peace of mind and heart, and rekindled my faith.
Meg
9/27/2009
My husband and I have been married for two years and been together for six, at first our relationship was wonderful he would help me around the house, understand the moods I was in, and know he doesnt even seem to care any more. He does not help me with anything. I hope by watching this movie will help change our marriage and make it better, our fights we get in have seem to be getting worse and worse everytime. He tells me he does not care anymore if I go and file for divorce that he is just so tired of having to deal with me and my problems.Thank you all for listening.
Sharon
Sharon
9/26/2009
Today is September 26, 2009. I watched Fireproof for the first time....by myself. I'm feeling drained, emotional, stunned....I have been seriously weighing my pro's and con's on divorce over the last month. I've been married for 8yrs, 2nd marriage for both of us. I could completely relate to Kathryn.....right down to the computer issues. I was smart enough to add one component more though....food! I've been wonderful enough to take all my anger, frustration, stress...you name it....out on me...and have gained a whopping 40 lbs. My rationale for that...simple....as i have told my husband, what I have learned over the last 5yrs is it doesn't matter if I have short hair or long hair, straight hair or curly hair, thin or fat.....he has completely forgotten about me.....us. He takes such superior care of his cars, garage, yard.....and bends over backwards to please his friends...but has neglected me in the process.
a nurse and a cop we are....both of who give of ourselves daily for others....hero's to some but not to each other.
My mom is always telling me to put GOD first, to ask for his help, to ask for his forgiveness. I go to church....sometimes.....but that isn't enough.
I am willing to take this 40 day Love Dare.... I am wanting to.
For anyone who read this, I am asking you to pray for me, my marriage.... I will do the same for all of you.
Vicki
vicki
9/25/2009
My husband Tim and I just got married last June. We have been together for a little over 4 years and have a 2 year old little girl together. My story is pretty much like everyone else's. Im wondering when it all changed. We used to go out with friends every weekend. And actually we never went out on the town, we all got together for pizza and beer, the guys played music and the girls would chat. When I got pregnant is changed a little. Maybe it was just me. I wanted someone to be able to help support our little family but Tim only worked part time and wouldnt look for a full time job. Then he was helping paint a house and he fell and broke his ankle. He now has 2 plates and 9 pins in his ankle. So while I was pregnant, and not working, neither was he. He finally healed just in time for the birth of our daughter. I thought things would get better, but they really havent changed. Skip forward a couple of years. After sticking it out at his job for 3 years working part time, they gave him full time just a few months ago. So he went from working less than 20 hours a week to over 40. I am not complaining about that at all. But he's now always at work and when he's not at work he's sleeping or playing his xbox360. He plays that thing for hours on end. And I've tried to tell him that its affecting us but he doesnt listen. We dont fight at all. But I feel that if he keeps living like he's a single teenager playing his video games, we wont last much longer. We dont do anything together anymore. And Im afraid it'll not only affect us but our daughter. So when I saw the movie i decided to take the dare in hopes it'll do something, spark something new. He knows im doing the dare, and Ive tried to get him to watch the movie but he said he didnt need to or want to. Maybe he'll just read the book with me and hopefully we can get something out of all of this.
Meshele
9/24/2009
Today is the first day of my 40 day journey. After 11 years of marriage it seems like each year keeps getting worse. There have been several talks of divorce. This is not at all what I want. I have decided that for 40 days, just a goal to start with, that I will learn to serve Jennifer. I am hoping that we can both get to a point to where we can experinece the intimate love that GOD has created for a man and woman.
James
9/23/2009
I am beginning my journey through the love dare today. My husband and I have been married for 3 years, and though we love one another deeply, for the past 2 years we have let small, insignificant issues turn into huge fights. Our fights have become so bad at times that we have threatened to end our marriage and walk away. That is not at all what I want or what he wants, and it is certainly not the life we envisioned for ourselves when we said our vows. I believe in marriage and I believe in love. I always thought I would be a perfect wife and a perfect mom - and in many ways, my life is set up to be exactly that... I've got the house with the white fence and the dog...I've got a beautiful 15 month old daughter and am currently pregnant with a son, due in February. I know that God has blessed me with so much. Most days I feel embarrassed and ashamed about the way I have behaved around my husband - and worst of all - in front of my child. How did I let it get to this point? I never wanted anything more in life than to have a happy family. The fact that it is now in disarray... it makes me feel like a failure. But I am determined to set it right. I need to do this now for the both of us. My husband does not know that I am doing this dare. I want to do it for the both of us, in hopes that along the way he will be motivated to change simply by my actions.
So here I go.. ready for all the hard days ahead. I know that it won't be easy to change, but I also know that it will be worth it in the end. I need to hold on to the idea that unconditional love is possible and that, even though it seems like the odds are against us at times, that we can and will be that couple that celebrates their 50th wedding anniversary. And hopefully, after these next 40 days are up, we will be back to being as loving and as good to each other as we were when we were newlyweds, and I will finally find the woman inside me that's been hiding for so long. Wish me luck.... and best of luck to all of you out there. I hope you find what you are looking for.
Kelly
9/17/2009
Well... I just got married on the 12th of September and our pastor is giving us the love dare books tonight at our bible study. We have been together for 7 years and have a 5 year old son together. I can't wait to start this and see how much I come to find out about my new Husband! :-) Wish us luck!
Michelle
9/17/2009
I just watched the movie lastnight. It completely spoke to me. I feel jsut like Katharine in the movie. My husband doesnt help me with anything. We have three children and I feel as though Im the only adult and parent in this house. I have tried to talk to him and explain how I feel and he just shuts me out telling me I act old or he is tired of me nagging at him. I would love to try the love dare. However, I have read several other books on being a godly wife and mother and it hasnt gotten me anywhere. I have tried so hard to change my way of living hoping that he would seee a change and want it too. But eventually I just end up having a complete emotional break down. Pleading for him to just change and help me. We have been seperated in the past, because he didnt want to grow up and be responsible. We got back together when he joined the Army and told me how much we meant to hima ndhe didnt want to lose us. And we had that new relationship, kind of honeymoon stage, for a while but now it is back to the same old thing. He thinks that jsut because he joined the army that he has every right to not be a father and husband. he has settled with jsut being a provider. I want to do this and see if it work. Im going to buy the book. I guess I really wish he would do it.
Allison
9/16/2009
Me and my husband have been married three years but together for six years. I truly do believe he is my soul-mate as they say. However, lately we just seem to be at different points in our lives. We have also gone through many financial issues and changes. He has been laid off several times over the past couple years which has taken a toll on both of us. I feel he doesn't have any goals in life and while he has been laid off I am the one always picking up the pieces and looking for jobs for him. I take care of everything, house, kids and also work full-time while trying to complete my degree. He did finally get another job that barely pays his bills so I am now the bread-winner as well which puts even more strain on me and the marriage. I have lost alot of respect for him because he could get side jobs or a second job but doesn't put in any extra effort to help me or our family. This is not the man I first met or married. I am on the verge of giving up because I feel like a single parent with just another child instead of a partner, I don't know what to do. I love him and do not want to get divorced but I'm scared that things might be too far gone. I plan to get this book and do the Dare to see if this can help us because it is our last hope to saving our marriage.
9/13/2009
I have been married 3 and half months.. YES MONTHS... expecting my first child...and im broken... I know that i serve a greater God than what i give credit for, but im broken. My Marriage i found out is built on mountains and hills of lies. My husband has a lying issue and I had no idea. He decieved everyone that i know and myself. I have spent 2 motnhs arguing with God and asking why he has done this to me. I sit before God and everyone today to know Im broken. I know that we have the faith to move mountains. We have the authority given to us by God to tell satan not to be another statistic of divorce. We watched fireproof at the end of July and i cried through the whole thing. I realized how engulfed in flames my marriage was and it was gonna take something to change it. But i did nothing. I grew more mad with each day and each battle that i lost to my husband. I grew bitter and I grew desperate for help. While we went to church and noone knew that hours before we were calling it quits. noone knew that this newlly wed couple was soon to be newly divorced...until 2 days ago... this weekend i was babysiting for my best friend. a way to get away from him and just be around fun whole hearted kids...needless did i know that my journey to a fireproof marriage was going to start. The kids and i were driving to the park... they said put it on Cd 4 number 12 not 3 cause that dosent have the words but numb 12 i did and i hear the music than i hear the voices from the movie... i hear him tell his dad that the marriage is over and the dad say 40 days give me 40 days... as my eyes filled with tears I realized How great God is... 40 days i was going to do 40 days and i was going to save my marrieage. My 40 days... it starts today... Sept 14, 2009 i will wait for the lord to change my heart...I will worship and i will survive this marriage... I will overcome and be as strong as a mustard seed that moves mountains. I WILL BE FIREPROOF.
On a side note I have a friend that I was confiding in that has been married 8 years... dealing with the lying situation who many times has called it quits... her and I will be hitting our knees together going to battle for our husbands our selves our children and most important our marriage. 40 days... to freedom!!!
WORSHIP WHILE IM WAITING,
Ash
Ashley
9/9/2009
My husband and I have been married for a year and a half now. Both being our second marriages. We have had so many problems that us ending up happily together seems almost impossible. When I met him he was still married to his ex-wife and neglected to tell me this. However, he eventually told me and I agreed to see him once his divorce papers were served. It was very difficult and I had to trust him as he was still living in the same house with his then wife. The divorce eventually went through but he lied to me about the contact that they had and it really hurt me in the process. This angered me and funny how he never realised how much this hurt me or what part he played in this and how now it leads to a lack of trust. He had abuse issues (alcohol) and would start drinking every Friday night. I didnt want to go home on a week-end because he would get so drunk and have no control over what happened around him. This embarrassed me as he would just pass out wherever he was and whilst in this drunken stupor his son would take advantage of him. If I said anything during this time it would lead to terrible arguments on my side because I could not respect a man who didnt have respect for himself. His son would take advantage of this and pack their things and they would leave and go to his brother's place for the week-end leaving me worried, angry and concerned. His son was allowed to talk disrespectfully to me and put me out of our house. My daughter would pick up on this and she would start acting disrespectfully towards him too. Which leaves us with serious issues now. Now my husband cannot understand why I cannot get close to his son when he never managed the situation as my husband. I have no problem with his daughter because she doesnt try to rule him and she accepts the fact that we are married. Whereas his son would want nothing better than for him to go back to his exwife. We are separated now and we watched the movie. I Love him and I know that I have my faults which I am willing to work on and so suggested the Love Dare. To my surprise he went out and bought us both the books and the dvd. I know he is still committed and that if both of us can face our faults and not blame the other party we can ensure our future happiness. If GOD is for us who can be against us and I also believe that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. So please pray that this works for us.
Roschelle 02 September 2009
Roschelle
9/9/2009
I have been reading through the stories, and my heart just cries out. I am in so much pain with my marriage at the moment, I have never felt so helpless and alone before, but reading through your site it strangely gives me comfort that I am not the only one out there fighting for my marriage.
My husband and I have been together for 8 years, married for 2 with two beautiful children. Our relationship has never been easy, but our love has always been so strong that it has held us together. 6 months before the birth of our second child, I read Debi Pearls book on being a HelpMeet, and our relationship bloomsed into something amazing, it had never been better.
But now, 3 months after babies birth we have hit rock bottom. My husband has turned verbally abusive, distant, bordering on physically violent, intimidating, and seems to enjoy playing pyscological mind games with me. He keeps telling me he wants me to leave, but as a Christian wife (my husband is a non-believer) I will not do that. I have tried everything I can to bring my husband back to me, but he has got further and further away. He has now made a job decision that just doesn't seem to be in the best interests of our family as it won't bring in enough money each week to pay all our bills and put food on the table. We have been struggling before, even relying on a local charity to provide us with food. We were presented with a job opportunity that has dragged us up from the bottom, allowed us to pay bills freely, save money and even have money to play with. Why he wants us to go back to our old hard life I don't know?...
I have now hit rockbottom - I have continued to pray but my strength is fading. I feel like I am constantly crying, trying to shelter myself from his latest harsh words or actions when I know I should be holding my head up and being the best wife I can.
The lord led me to this book a few weeks ago, and it has sat in my bible bag untouched. Its time to make another mammoth effort and save my marriage and live in beautiful harmony with my husband as the lord intended
9/2/2009
My husband and I have been together for over four years and married for just over one year. We have a child barely under one. Our relationship has been strained since before we ever got married. The last nine months have been horrible. Over a month ago I left him. I could not live with someone who I do not respect, who has addiction problems, who treats me terribly, and runs me down. My boss recommended that I watch Fireproof last week. This past weekend I rented the movie. I cried all the way through it. The day after that I called my husband and asked him to rent it. He watch the movie and cried thru it too. That movie is an exact mirror of our marriage. My husband bought the book and we agreed to do the Love Dare together. We have forgiven eachother and are starting over. I believe that Christ wanted us to watch this movie. Christ is at work in our lives and wants us to have patience with eachother to fix this marriage. I love my husband and I know that he loves me. Because of this movie we are starting from scratch and vowed to put forth the work to make our marriage work. I thank God and the makers of this movie for saving my marriage. It is a true miracle.
Andrea
9/2/2009
My husband and I have been married for almost three years, we have known one another for seven or eight years. I remember the first time I saw him I fell in love with him. we finally started talking on the internet and talked every night. my friend asked him all the time if he liked me and he would say no, which makde me mad at him for a while, but I loved him no matter what so I got over it. he came to our church some and I went to his house some, but it was like he was avoiding me. then other times, it was like HE LIKES ME, I JUST KNOW IT! after about three years or so he asked if I would meet him at Wal-Mart, he was going to the beach in a few days and wanted me to help him with getting some things, I went and he talked to me about us getting together when he came back, I was sooooo happy. This was the week of July 4th, He came back and did not talk to me untill January. I went to church one sunday morning, and my aunt brought this guy with her that she wanted me to date, we had known each other since birth, and I had to go to my husbands church to sing that night, and the other guy was suppose to go with me, he didnt show, so I went to wesleys church, he sat with me, I was sooo nervous, he kept trying to hold my hand, and I was mad, I was sitting there thinking, you didnt talk to me for months now your trying to hold my hand? But after church he asked me if I would go with him some where, I said sure. I could not say no. But when I got home, He said he was taking me out for my birthday that was coming up. I said no you dont have to, He said your my girlfriend, I think I can, I didnt know when he asked me to go some where with him, that we were dating. But I was so happy, We only dated 6 months when he asked me to marry him, but there was no doubt in my mind, he was the one I wanted to spend forever with. We got married 9 months later, and our marriage is just not working, we try then something happens again. we have talked about divorce, but I do not want that, like in the movie, he is a fireman, I always thought of him and still do as MY FIREMAN, MY HERO. I know he loves me, and I love him, but he works two jobs and we just dont spend time together. I miss those days of dating. When you could feel the love very strong in everything we did. I need help, we need help. I know God does not want anyone to get a divorce. I knwo he can help if we are willing to try....
Thanks,
Heather
Heather
9/1/2009
9/1/09
My husband and I have been married almost 20 years. Our marriage has had many ups and downs but I have always continued to love my husband and support him. I have always been there for him when he was down to pick him back up. My husband has always had some type of substance abuse (alcohol) that I have over looked and tried to ignore. We have two wonderful boys together and he has been such a great father to them. 12 years ago he told me one night that he needed time away to determine if he loved me so he moved out leaving me and my 3 children (I was a single parent with my daughter before I met my husband). He said he loved me as his best friend but not as a man loves a woman. During his time away to reflect he went out to the bars drinking, etc, before I knew it he had a girlfriend that he lived with most of the time. We somehow worked through this and I forgave him. During the last 11 years we have continued to have our ups and downs (he is still drinking). He drinks a bottle of wine on his way home each day from work - he thinks we don't know but my sons and I can tell. He doesn't realize that sometimes he acts so rediulous that my oldest son (18 yrs) will look at me and say "he's been drinking again". Three weeks ago he got really drunk on a Friday night and kept texting someone like a teenager while we had a bunch of neighbors over that he had invited. After an hour he went inside and never came back out - the neighbors finally left and I went in to check on him. He was passed out in our bathroom with his phone held close to his heart. I took his phone just to see who he had been texting all night. To my shock he was texting another woman (someone he works with)...one text that I saw said "I think I love you..." then one that said "wanna f..." and it went on from there. The text back from her were just as bad. I was devestated! I didn't know what to do. The next morning he didn't remember ANYTHING! When I confronted him about this he acted like I was an idiot. I asked him to drop all contact with this woman and we could work on our marriage. He didn't, over the remainder of the weekend I saw a few more text and then he got smart and started deleting them. By Monday he had lied to me over 20 times...I logged onto our cell phone account and saw how many times a day the texted each other and how many times they talked. It had been going on for quite some time. The night I kicked him out he kept saying how he loved me and how could I do this to our family. He said it was a good business arrangement why am I messing that up. Since then we have tried to work through this - I do love him more than anything. He lived with this woman for 2 weeks then moved in with a friend who is married. We had MANY talks on the phone on how to make our marriage work. We would spend hours on the phone talking....then when I would look at our cell phone log he was still texting her and talking to her. He kept playing me. He came by this past Sunday to see the boys and we had a small discussion. He told me he loved me as his friend and the mother of his children but did not desire me. He has not kissed me for over 10 years but he has his new friend. My heart was broken - I had been reading all the materials I could get my hands on to help strenghten our marriage and he just wanted to walk away. Before he left I told him regardless of how this turned out always know that I Loved him and would be here if he ever needed to talk. I told him I would pray that he found what he was looking for and kept his relationship with his sons in good standing. I would never say anything negative about him to the boys or let them know what has happened. He started crying, hugged me and asked me to give him 24 hours. I said I would give him what time he needed to honestly pray and decide what he wanted out of life. The next day he called and said he needed more time but he assured me that he was not going to be at "Her" house or with her. Of course I now have this trust issue going on, I checked the phone log and he didn't call her nor did she call him. I do see where she texted him a few times and he did respond. He called me on his way home from work and we talked an hour - it was another GREAT talk. I felt so happy - he said that when he left the house the day before he actually cried all the way back to his place - not just a little boo hoo he said he cried out loud! I hadn't see my husband cry in over 12 years and it was just a few tears. I hope the cry did him some good to help him open his heart to our Heavenly Father so that our Heavenly Father can help him though this. He sent me a text last night before he went to bed saying "Luv U"....I am so lost, I have asked God to bless my husband with comfort to be able to put all outside contacts aside and to really pray for what he wants. I know that I have made many mistakes in our marriage but am willing to work on making it stonger. I want to fall "IN LOVE" with my husband all over again and I want him to fall in love with me again. I watched Fireproof this morning...I am going out at lunchtime today to purchse my own book of the Love Dare today and try this on my husband. Please wish me luck.
9/1/2009
We met on the internet about three years ago and started dating. After a year my now wife insisted on getting married as we loved each other and this was all that mattered. We got married in February of 2008. We both came out of marriages where the other partner committed infidelity. While dating I discovered anger in my partner that was serious. I always had to face lame excuses for her lack of love towards my children and family. I loved and still love her dearly. Every little issue becomes a huge argument where one or the other always threatened to leave or want a divorce. I stayed strong wanting my marriage to work. I tried everything, from books to movies. Nothing seems to change in my partner. Her needs are always more important than mine. There is a certain amount of unfairness when it comes to my needs. All I ever wanted is to be happy and that my children are accepted by her like I accepted hers. Somehow, there is always an excuse as to why my children cannot be accepted and treated the same. We are separated for three months now and live apart but see each other on certain days and weekends. We continuously argue over children, family and possessions. The time I am suppose to spend with her. My hobbies always seem to take too much of her time. Me going to church and fulfilling my ministerial duties are noted as time away from her. We strongly believe in God, however, worship at different churches and often have heated discussions surrounding our faith. She constantly questions my way of belief and sometimes mocks it. This has been going on for three years and I cannot take the abuse no more. Yet I want this to work because of my vows to God. I pray daily for things to change. I ask God to show me the way. Show me if I am the stumbling block? Have I not humbled myself enough? We even went to a marriage counselor and nothing is working. I am committed to this marriage and will take on the challenge. We watched the movie together and enjoyed it. It was heartwarming. I can only hope that this works.
Johann
Johann
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