STORIES
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12/26/2012
I have done the love dare book and it works. The first time I tried it was 3 years ago and I was on the verge to lose everything. My wife and 2 beautiful little girls. But as I prayed for help from god I also realized it was me that wanted out. And so I prayed to god to bring me together with my wife. And well it was very successful, but here is the lesson I have learned from all this. PLEASE, DON'T GIVE UP ON THE BOOK! Keep doing it even if you’re on day 90 keep doing it. I was with my wife for 10 years before we got married. I was the type of guy who didn't believe in marriage because everyone around me was either divorced or getting divorced. So I was against it but the love dare book made me realize I need to marry my beautiful wife. And we've been married for 3 years now. And guess what? "I'm starting the book all over again, today!"
Keeping doing the book for the rest of your life if you have too. It’s truly a blessing and I'm also going to start the "Courageous" book as well because I have realized I need to be a better husband to my wife and a better father figure to my girls.
God Bless you and don't give up on your marriage. Give yourself 40 days at a time and god will help you.
Proverbs 23:26 NLT “O my son, give me your heart. May your eyes take delight in following my ways".
12/24/2012
Hi
My Husband and I are not IN love anymore. We still love each other and I still want to be married but he is wanting divorce. We have a little girl who is only one year. Over the last three years of our Ithe pain I have caused him and our family. I have been trying so hard to prove to him that I'm different and win back his love but it isnt working. I fear for the worst....DIVORCE. I don't want our family to break up. What more can I do? I am trying out the love darebecause I simply am lost and can really use some godly advice at this point. How else can I improve myself?
Kimberly.
12/20/2012
My husband and I have been together for almost 3 years. Married only 5 months. I have just discovered my husband looking at porn and talking to other women online. I have never felt more hurt, betrayed, and confused. I know he loves me. He shows it in every other way. He takes very good care of me, always tries to make sure I'm happy, talks about me at work and to his friends and family. But he seems to be a whole other person online and forgets he's married. We have talked about it. Then we fought about it. It seems like all we do now is fight. At first he seemed like he was actually sorry and he seemed really upset that he hurt me. He said he wouldn't do it again. Well, I'm pretty sure he stopped talking to other women but he still looks at porn. He knows this upsets me. He told me he would stop. This time his attitude about it was different. He didn't seem like he really cared that he hurt me again. He says it's not a big deal and that every guy does it. Lusting after another woman is cheating in my eyes. But he doesn't agree. I tried to watch fireproof with him but he refuses to watch it with me. I know he won't do this love dare with me. But I want to try it out because I need to improve myself. I need to be a better, more supportive wife. I want him to see a change in me and maybe he'll decide to put forth the effort too. I don't want to fight anymore. I love him and want to stay his wife. I want to work through this. I need to learn to love me as well because he totally crushed every little bit of self-esteem I had.
Ashley
12/18/2012
I was 19 when i got married I am 27 now my husband and I have nothing in common anymore except for children. Sometimes I look back and wonder where my bestfriend and soulmate went. I talk to walls now and receive blank stares anymore. There is no communication even though I have told him what I want and need from him. He seems to not care but says he does. Action speak louderthan words in my oppinion. how can you be married to a person and feel single? Every day I struggle to not just pack up and go. I am starting the love dare today but I know he will not see a change. I love him but I am no longer in love with him. How can I keep from feeling so empty inside? All I want is him and all he wants is not me.
Melissa
12/17/2012
So...my husband and I started dating in 2003. We had our 1st child in 2006, got married in 2008, had our second in 2010, and our third this past September. We've always been really good at talking to and with each other. Never hid anything, and when people asked how long we had been together we really had to think cause it never felt like we had been together that long. Things felt good and we were in a good place. Although we are young(both 29), we have been through more things than some couples who have been married for 30 years. When I was 7 months pregnant with our third child I took a trip back home, and when I returned things were so different. Within a month he told me he didn't want to be married, moved out, and here I am. He recently filed papers for divorce, and I'm still at a loss. I love him, and I always will. He doesn't want to put in the work to save our marriage, but I'm hoping this challenge will at lest help me heal and move on.
Natasha
12/17/2012
Hello ive been with my husbend for 12 years. we were together very young he was 16 and i was 18. We have four kids and are now seperated. its been almost two months. We went though alot of ups and downs but i never thought this is were we would end up. He lives with his sister and does what he pleases. I just recently found out from him that he is talking to a girl at work. He says its just talking but im heartbroken. He says he dosnt know how long he wants to be gone are if he wants to come back at all. I pray every night and ask God to help me. Last night for the first time i seen fireproof. ive been trying to do all i can to get him back and i dont know if i should try the 40 day chalenge. I did do the first day and i did well when he told me he can not take the kids because he was sick. i wanted to believe him and leave it but i didnt. i drove to his sisters and he was not there are at the basketball center. my mind started to wonder where he is who is he with. im a mess. i dont know what to do are how to let it be. I just dont want my kids to be second to some girl. but also dont what the devil to put thoghts in my head. i want to know if i should continue the 40 day chalange are just go on and leave him to what he wants to do. please help me i am praying and trying. :( thank you all -leslie
12/16/2012
I watched the movie today, 2nd time round and cried more than I did the first time. I cried through out the whole film. I identified with Jacob & his wife as the relationship at the start of the movie is exactly the relationship we are experiencing. So many hurdles we have overcome throughout our 20 year marriage and we are still fighting for love. I want to be valued, seen, heard. I have ordered the 40 day dare and I'm looking forward to reading those pages and putting into action as I want to see results. Initially I was going to give it to him stating if he truly loves me he will read it, my thoughts being I,m the one who does the self help stuff, reading all the books that can benefit my marriage, praying to God & making changes but now I think I need to do this for me as it will make me a better wife, person, mother, friend.
I am planning on sitting my man down to watch this movie, I hope without my pointing anything out he wiiil see what I saw.
Leanne
12/16/2012
My Stories must begin with some history. I grew up in a broken home marred by Alcoholism and Abuse. From an early age I was in and out of the system. At five years old I was taken to a Baptist Children’s Home but the laws back then were always in favor of the bio-parents if they could get it together. So every time they tried to straighten up I got sent home. At the age of eight I went to a Baptist Church when I had been sent home yet again and asked to be sent back to the farm. The drinking and abuse started again and all I knew was I wanted out. I did not leave again until I was 18 years of age. In my life the drinking and abuse made an impression on me. I had a set of Foster parents who lived on a big farm and I went to live with them because they worked for the Baptist Organization. The one problem with them was they could never adopt me but they did their best to make me a home. He was the Pastor of the church we went to as well. I loved them as if they were my Mom and Dad. Now the marriage part: I married my first wife at 20 years of age, I was in the Navy and it was not good from the start. She was restless and she had never dated anyone else and blamed me for this. She strayed and wanted what was called an open marriage. I would not agree so we divorced. We did not attend church and God was not really part of the marriage. In my early years of life I had been saved, but like so many thought that was all it took, I did not work on my spiritual life and my first marriage suffered. She did give me two beautiful girls out of the marriage. I met my second wife and we married in 1988. She loved my girls and we adopted a Korean Infant in 1995. Our marriage was good and I had a good job. But I had a job which required 75 percent travel and that was a thing that began to cause trouble in the marriage. We stopped talking and doing things together. She could smile at other men but never at me. I suspected she was seeing another but could never prove it. We argued all the time. My job also ended due to the economy. I found another one in another state and she suggested I should take that. She would come if things worked out. I did and told her I wanted a divorce. We talked about it. But I was not okay. I felt that God had deserted me. I did love my wife but I felt if she wanted out she would leave anyway. I had let my Christian Life once again slip and blamed God. At this time I met my friend from my childhood. We started seeing one another but I could never commit because I felt like I was searching for something. And two wrongs never make a right. Then God gave me my wake-up call. Six months into the separation God called me home. Not once but three times. The last time I was dead for 105 seconds. Pronounced and somehow I came back. During my visit with God I saw the warmest brightest light I ever saw I wanted the light but could not get to the other side of the door. I believe it was God telling me it was not yet my time to go. My wife during that time decided she was not going to give me up either. It took four months of rehab to get me home again. I came home changed and during that time we grew closer. I came home with Brain damage (loss of five years previous) and we began again. I decided to put God first and I put my wife and children second. It has taken some time and I will not say it has been easy but I want it to work. My wife and I committed to the church and God. I still travel in my work (I want to work at home but no jobs). I pray every day for God to never let me do the things I did again. I thank him for the blessings in my life such as my wife and children. I thank him for the prayers he has answered. I also thank him for the unanswered prayers. I try and walk with him. I asked him to let me live each day and love her as he does and see her through his eyes. The problems in my marriage were my fault. I took her for granted. But really the problem is when we take God for Granted and we decide we can do it on our own. It is a challenge but it is well worth the fight to keep it together. Thank you for God for allowing me to tell this. You are on throne. AMEN!
David W
12/11/2012
I was scrolling through the Netflix movie choices and came across Fireproof. This movie has helped me realized how ungrateful I've been throughout my marriage. My husband and I been married for 7 years, together a total of 10 years. He worked offshore for about 5 years. He is gone for 30-60 days and only home for 2 weeks. Every time he's home, I fuss about not having his support and help with the kids, cleaning, and other things. I am a student and has a full time job, I guess I'm overwhelmed and stress. One thing I have not realized, until today is the sacrafice he made for his family. He put his life on the line every day, without an off day. I never stopped and told him how appreciative I am. I talks to him while he's working and the entire conversations are arguments. Everyday I develop some kind of departure from him. Things has gotten so bad, I do not answer his calls sometimes. While he is home, we separate ourselves from each other to cease the arguments. I want to make things work for our two children. I need help!
Lakisha
12/9/2012
As I type this, my heart is so horribly heavy. My husband and I have 25 days till our divorce is final and every day my heart breaks more. I have done the love dare after he begged me to almost a year ago but I was too angry at him then. Now it has opened my eyes to how I contributed to him finding someone else. No I'm not putting the blame on myself but I recognize where I failed as a servant of god and what the bible states I need to be for my husband. The love dare has taught me so many lessons but there are two people in the marriage and I cannot try for us both. We have trust issues we both need to overcome....me with his infedlity and him thinking I am not being genuine or that I will continue to serve him with a submissive heart, calm, and patient. Time is running out and I just wish he would find that place in his heart to quit with the "other distractions" and seek god again and accept the changes I have made in my own struggles. I know whatever happens, I will lean on god and not my own understanding and pray I will continue to have a willing and patient heart that will love again and be a better wife thanks to love dare!!
Anndi
12/4/2012
My husband and I have been married for 8 1/2 years. 2 months ago my husband approached me and let me know that he is unhappy and wants a divorce. I am completely devastated! I am still very much in love with him and want to make it work. I am praying that this love dare can change my marriage.
12/3/2012
My husband and I are married for 29 years and we had 3 beautiful children. Our relationship has always been a challenge due to our personality. Lately I discovered that he was seeing another woman for the last 2 years. I was devastated. We decide to work on our marriage but my emotion is very much ups and downs as I lost my trust on him. He is a good man but he made bad choices. He keeps blaming me for the cause of his affair. Is this normal for a disloyal partner to lay blame on his spouse for his affair? I need help. I also start the 40 day Love Dare today.
Elaine
12/2/2012
My name Is Christina and My husbands name is Benjamin. We have been married 4 years now. In sepetember he decided to leave me for a 3rd time. I always pray and keep the hope that we will work things out. So far we have moved back in together and are in a place that I pray will allow us to flourish.
My husband once was a true man of God, after 18 months in Iraq, something changed inside him. I hear stories of this man he used to be and I am actually jelous I never got a chance to know this man inside him. He is bright and so full of life and extremely intelligent. I try and push him to be the best man he can be. It hurts me to see him sale him self short. He is an alcholic and becomes a man I dont even know when he drinks. I see so much hurt inside him and know not how to comfort him.
I know I am far from perfect. I suffer from depression,anxiety and ADHD. As you can imagin I need emontional security and stability. I keep it under control though prayer instead of medicine. Oh how hard it is sometimes to control my emontions and not lash out in my moments of insecurity and hoplessness. I have been fighting so hard for my marriage and will do what ever it takes, no matter what.
I once again am going to try the 40 day challenge. I ask for all of your prayers so that I may keep the heart and mind I need to accept this challenge. Prayers to give me the strength to continue the journey to compleate this challenge. May my love endure all of the hurt and pain and set my husband free of his burdens. Today I make the choice to follow the words God has spoken and love my husband as God loves me.
Christina
11/30/2012
I am on day 3 of the love dare, i am doing it alone without my husbands knowledge... my husband has filed for divorce because he says i have hurt him so much... i have been negative towards him because of my own insecurities, i have put him down to raise myself up and for the last 3 years he has warned me that if this continues he would leave... i never ever believed this but now i am facing a life of a divorcee with a 3 year old son to care for, the last few weeks I have suffered with the pain i have caused him because I do truly love him... After visiting with my uncle who is a pastor he told me that God's time is not my time and therefore i should do the love dare and see where it takes me not only as a wife but as a woman...
I am so afraid to lose my husband but have decided to hand my problem to God and have Him resolve it for me...
I know it may not work out as I hope but I am filled with hope that I can win my husbands' love back...
muneerah
11/29/2012
My wife and I were separated and living apart 2 years ago. She was in a relationship and we were in the process of divorce. When I saw Fireproof it started a fire in my heart that made be believe I would get back my wife. I bought the book and started the challenge. It was difficult at first. My wife hated me and was fighting everything I did. I didn't let it stop me. I followed the book for every word. I prayed a little extra than what was in the book. As I reached day 25 , I saw no change with her . I started to wonder , how would 15 more days make a difference? But I continued, I refused to quit. This was the hardest thing to do in my life. I had to keep loving and showing love even though I was getting rejected. By day 30 things started getting better. She would call me and text me to see how I was. By day 38 she left the person she was seeing and moved back in with me. I don't know how , but before 40 days I got my wife back. God is Good. This book is great. I passed it on to friends but they didn't have what it takes to make it work. Thanks for such a great book.
claudy
11/29/2012
To all, that is on this site. I have been with my loving wife now for the better part of 22years. We have two children, one (a son) from her previous relationship and my daughter between the both of us. I notice that most of the troubles that are being experienced are from marriages ranging from 2 to 10 years. Please, if you love each other, you will stay together. I and my wife have had so many trial and errors it is unreal. We have fought many times in our marriage. I have never strayed to any woman. I have always truly been devoted to my wife. My wife has strayed in 2010 with another man, and at one point developed feelings for him. I found out, but for some reason, I was not about throwing away 20 years of trying to keep this marriage together. Believe me when I say, that couples will finally reach common ground in which they will realize that being together is the one thing that matters to one another. Even, if it feels like being friends again. Lovers are one thing that you as a couple will always be; no matter what. In Christian marriages, it is ok for the love making to cease once in a while for marriages. The Lord has blessed you when you are actually able to stay together for more than 5 years. Be strong and pray, and most important; do not lose hope for your marriage sake. One of you has to be strong in order to see the positive side of things and in the end if it does not work. It’s ok. Now, I and my wife are closer than ever, both as lovers and friends. I do not know what I would do if I lost her. My love is grand for her. My perception of life as it is, is one that I have come to appreciate dearly. After so many trial and errors through my time, I have become the type of man that sees not only through his own eyes but now through that of his love as well. I say this in hopes that it will somehow send the message that not only can one achieve goals and be successful in careers while married, but can also do the same in their marriage as well. So my perception of life is this; life is full of good surprises and many bad to come with it, but through perseverance, hope and faith within one’s self; we can achieve the happiness that one needs in order to make it through till the end. In doing so, you can truly feel safe that your children and their children will grow though the centuries as a strong family
Ron
11/29/2012
We have been married for 14 1/2 years and have been together for 17 years and we have 6 children together. Our rough times haver certainly out weighed the good times. She is now at the point that she has all but given up and left. It's more than staying together for the kids. She says that I dont make her laugh anymore and that when she does it is fake just to get by. We dont talk hardly at all anymore unless it is about problems that need to be solved. How can two people be together for 17 years and not have anything to talk about. I have attempted the Love Dare in the past and only made it to Day 7 things started to change and get better so I just quit. I love my wife with every peice of my being and don't ever have to face life without her. I do know that she should never had to face marriage and life without me either even though I live in the same home. I am commited to the Love Dare all 40 + days if needed. I am going to journal each day and pray that God works a huge change in our hearts for each other.
D.J.
11/28/2012
I'm Melissa my husband is Brian. We have been together 7 yrs married 4 if them. I recently strayed from our marriage began talking to another man even developed feelings for him. My husband and I have both contributed to the stress on our marriage lost track of what's important to us both. We both have the doubt of is it really worth it is keeping our marriage together the rite thing to do....more importantly we both want to try to make it work. We recently started marriage counseling and I'm doing this love dare. There was a reason God joined him and I together in marriage and I think we owe it to each other to try and fight for what God has given us.
melissa
11/28/2012
I have been married for 10 years. Our relationship is up and down. Over the years we have tried to work out our problems on our own, but no luck. Each time we think things are better our level of communication, lack of trust and selfishness returns. Now the days are "Hi" in the morning and no communication at all day. It really doesn't matter where he is nor what he does during the day. Im the same. It is like we are brother and sister or roomates. I really can't say we are lovers, because that was losted some time ago. 2/1/12 is our anniversary, I don' tknow how much more I am going to take. I mready to leave.
Manna2
11/27/2012
Hello,
I have been with my wife for a total of 5 years... married for 2 years and 9 months...married at the age of 19. I have served in the military for almost four years, and during that time i dont think about what ill ive accomplished with the military, but the struggles and despair ive dealt with over the course of my relationship. I have been a horrible husband, spouse, and friend. I have done things i can never forgive myself for... broken the ten commandments numerous times, lied like no other, and ultimately hurt my wife to the point where she doesnt want to even look me in the face. i am currentyl deployed in a secret location and havent had much time to talk with her. Anger fuels my everyday emotional state of mind and it seems that all is lost... that is until i watched FIREPROOF with an open mind, and an open heart. I am a christian as it is, but my faith adn walk with God has been shaky, and as a result, my marriage has suffered. I really feel this LOVE DARE can benefit my marriage, but also my walk with God. I am truly sorry for everything ive ever done to my wife. I hope she knows this... and I hope she can someday forgive me.
MARTIN #12
martin
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