STORIES
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4/22/2009
My husband & I wil be married 15 years in September. We have been together for 19. We have a May/December romance. I am almost 18 years older than he is. But in spite of that it has been the best years of my life. We got saved about 8 years ago. And have been doing quite well involved in our church and life has been good. The Lord has blessed us in so many ways. We saw the movie Fireproof. We both cried through it. At the time I am not sure if anything was going on with my husband or not. Then a church and family situation came along and things began to go south. My husband turned toward pornography on the internet and our relationship became physically and verbally abusive. It was a nightmare to say the lleast. One day out of the blue he called our pastor and told him he was quitting the church and he was divorcing me. I had known for sometime that something awful was about to happen. I was praying and everytime I would go to church I would request an unspoken request. Seeminly no one on the outside knew except us and the pastor. Pastor sent us to counseling. My husband opted out after a few sessions saying we could work this thing out ourselves. It didn't get much better. Pastor tried to meet with my husband on a regular basis and that didn't last either. I was growing weary but wasn't about to give up. The first thing that happened was our church held a Marriage Retreat. It was hosted by the counselor that we went to see. That was the beginning of the healing that needed to take place in our marriage. After that our church started a Marriage Class and the counselor that we were seeing was the teacher. The first book that we went through was called Love & Respect. My husband never read a single page of it. He was discouraged because we were involved in a program in the church and we couldn't be there every Sunday in the Love & Respect Class. The next class was on a book called The 5 Love Needs of Men & Women. We went to our pastor and asked if we could be excused from our obligation so we could be in every class. We have attended every class and I am amazed at how our marriage has turned around. We are now praying together, reading the Bible again, and treating each other the way God intended us to. It wasn't even this good before. I love my husband with all my heart! I don't know why we had to go through this but I am convinced that if God repaired my marriage he can repair any marriage. I would like to say to any man or woman who is going through a difficult time in your marriage to hold fast to your faith because God is not the author of divorce. Stay before the Lord in prayer. Find yourself a counselor, mentor, prayer warrior and hang on because God has a plan to bring you through whatever it is that you are going through. PRAISE HIS HOLE NAME!
4/22/2009
Well where do i begin....I was married for 8 years, and now divorced. I really wished the Love Diary had been out when I was in need of it then. I watched the movie so many times and I cry each and every time when I can see "myself" on that screen. It opened my eyes to my life and wished things could have been done different. I know now what my calling was...it was to help others to see that their marriage can be saved. And with the help of this movie and the Love Diary itself...there is not a marriage that can not be saved if both wants it bad enough. Don't give up like it did and turned my back...Love will always be there and strong enough if you just give you heart to God. With him...All things are possible.!
Brian
4/20/2009
I am going to start the Love Dare tomorrow. My husband of 6 years in July, 2009, and I have been separated and living apart since February 8, 2009. I want my marriage and our family. I know that he does too and we have so much to work through, that I am going to do this as a source of trying to make it work for us. I am praying very hard to God for His guidance and direction. I know if this marriage is what God wants me to have, it will be…..
He says the "relationships" are over. I am choosing to trust and believe him. He has gone back and forth about wanting to work on our marriage and not sure if he wants to. I know he feels ashamed and embarrassed by his behavior. Despite all that happened and how he dealt with his unhappiness in our marriage, I am not giving up yet. He said he doesn't want to either and isn't sure what we should do, but that he doesn't want a divorce and he doesn't want us to give up. We remain living separate and spend time together and with our daughters. This has been incredibly difficult not to mention everything else we're going through with jobs, having to sell our home regardless of what happens with our marriage because we can no longer afford it etc... I work full time and earn a very good wage. His income was double mine though and that will be ending soon. About 5 weeks ago I watched Fireproof after a friend/co-worker told me about it. I was so inspired that I rented it for my husband to watch on his own if he so chose to. He did watch it and said he found it had a very good message. I don't believe he would do the Love Dare with me, so I am going to start it tomorrow. We had already planned to get together and go on a picnic with our daughters and he is off work for 1 week so I thought tomorrow would be a good start date so that I could get consistency in applying the program while he can be around more. I am not sure how this is going to work since we aren't residing together right now, but I am going to give it everything in my being to work the daily readings and dares. Please pray for me and my marriage and family as I will for all of you! It is hard for me, but I am putting it all in God's hands.
Mary Beth
4/20/2009
the main essence of day 19 is to hand over control of your life to Jesus:
I have let Jesus into my heart (main chamber)
but stlll keep Him out of some areas.
Using two degrees as a help, I shall open the door of my computer porn to Jesus, just a wee bit, two degrees, and let that shaft of his light shine on that darkness: that He purges me from lust and porn addiction: that he help me satisfy my needs in a healthy God fearing way..... So Help Me God!
Su Min
4/20/2009
My wife and I have been together for almost 15 years, married for almost 7. There have many tough times, in the last two years we have split up for a month and have since tried to work out our differences. This past weekend she told me she wanted out. She still loves me but not the way she used to. She told me she no longer likes me and she can't stand to be with me.
I miss what we had and while I admit I have done several things wrong in our marriage, one of them being jealous of her friends and time that others get. After our children were born, I always seemed to be gone more and left her physically and emotionally. After our second child I was gone the most and told her I didn't even want to be around. I regret all of that and am now paying for it severely.
I want to keep fighting for it. I love her more than anything, always will. We have been through so much in our life. We watched fire proof about two months or so ago. I am not a religious man by any means. I did enjoy the movie and it was almost to a "T" what our life has become. I am in public service as a 911 dispatcher and a paid on call firefighter/EMT. I am not home much. I work nights. The odds are against me more so. After this past weekend, I am pretty sure that she has lost all hope in us, while I have not. Yesterday before work I went out and bought the book and read the entire thing because I have faith. I am ready for day one to begin and pray (which I am not used to or accustomed to doing) that I will have the chance to change things around and bring back the marriage we once had and let the love we once had shine back through. She is a very intelligent person, and after all these years I am still attracted to her as I was when we first met.
Although my actions have shown otherwise through the years I would do anything for this woman. I can't change the past. I can't make her forgive me but if the man upstairs is willing I hope she is as well.
I doubt she will ever read this, but you do know that I love you with all my heart and we are meant to be.
Brian
4/19/2009
It's amazing how I have gone all this time without noticing how bad things really are with my marriage. This movie... it was our marriage! All of the frustrations and the way they treated each other... that was me. I am a horrible husband and desire to be better for my wife. I would like to blame someone other than myself, but the fact is that I do NOT make my wife happy! I'm ready to change that. After seeing the movie on Friday I got the book. This WILL change the man I am for my wife! I don't mind to put it all out there (name and all) and say that I need to work on this. In 40 days I plan to look at my marriage, the man I am for my wife, and how things will be... and you'd better bet that The Lord will have done some work in me! I am soo ready for this and my wife soooo deserving. I will pray for you all and hope you to do the same for me. Without The Lord it is impossible... with The Lord ALL is possible!
James (undeserving husband of 5+ years now)
James
4/19/2009
I have been married to my husband for almost 2 yrs. my husband is in the ARMY and we have had problems since 3 wks after we got married... that was the first time he asked for a divorce. 4 months into our marriage he filed for divorce and then he deployed to Iraq for 15 months in December (6 months into our marriage) things got worst and he kept tellng me he wanted to get divorced he stopped talking to me 7 months after he deployed.(that was in July).. so for 8 months i didnt know much... i only knew he was ok bcuz i would see when he was online so that gave me some kind of comfort knowing that he was ok and in Novermber he told me he didnt love me and that he wanted to get divorced bcuz all the ladies he was talking to were being scared off bcuz he would tell them he was still married but getting divorced... so In February before coming back to the states he called me and told me he loved me and wanted me to move to Colorado where we were stationed i said no...
I he came home in march and 2 wks later he looked for me to tell me that he loves and needs me... i dont know what to think of it... i saw the movie fire proof today and I am gonna try to see if we can work this out.. ill keep you all posted
Veronica
4/16/2009
ever since me and my husband watched the movie it has touched our lives and we work together in more ways than just one. this movie is a great christian movie and more couples should watch this together.
4/16/2009
hi. i am 10 years old. i love fireproof.it is an inspiration to me. my mom and dad were having problems.then my daddy went and bought the love dare. yesterday was day 40 for them. daddy has started going to church and he is convicted . the love dare worked for them. i was hoping and praying that it woould work because they have had a very good marrige and i want them to be together forever!!! i have watched the movie alot. evry time mommy and daddy watch it their eyes tear up i am so glad they are back together now!!!
abby
4/15/2009
I just saw the Fireproof movie a couple of days ago. What an eye opener that was! The parallels between the movie and my own relationship were uncanny. (as I'm sure is the case with a lot of you guys!) My husband and I have been married 7 years and we have three kids, (6, 4, and 3). We've had our rough patches, but lately it seems like we have been growing apart more and more. I know it's both our faults. About a month and a half ago we were going through our biggest rough patch ever. I had found out he was looking at porn and chatting with some girls to hook up with. He had only been doing it for a couple days when I found out. We talked about it, and I know he really is sorry. I truly believe he won't do that again. The only thing is, that event had caused us to really evaluate our relationship, and we saw eachothers faults. We resoluted to try to fix those things and make our marriage even better than it had ever been. Marriage life was great about a week after that, but it slowly started to sink back into the stagnant existence it had been. But after I saw the movie, I felt that there was hope again. I knew all along that God should be the center of my marriage--that after Him, my husband should always be top priority. But it took that movie to really make it sink in and become reality. Without Him guiding me EVERY STEP of the way, I'll most likely fall, and slide down the hill farther into the pit. So I went and bought the book, and I'm starting today. Because with God, everything is possible! He can change me if I'm willing, and when I change, my husband will eventually notice. He'll be able to see Jesus in me! (Trust me, he'll notice the change, because one of my big faults is that I'm a slob!) But anyway, just wanted to share my story. I'm confident that I'll be sharing my (our!) successes soon! God bless you and God bless Sherwood and the team for putting together such an awesome tool to reach people in need of healing.
4/15/2009
This is a follow up story from 03/31/09. I am the one that has been married for nearly 12 years and cheated on my wife with a co-worker. I have quit my job and have started a new one since all of this has happened. I knew that I would never get my wife back if I would have kept my old job. I have also been doing The Love Dare. Today is day 40 and I have already read what I have to do and it is not going to be a problem. I am going to be like Caleb and keep going. Every day for the rest of my life I will try to prove to my wife that I love her more than ever and that I do want to spend the rest of my life with her. My life has changed since I began The Love Dare. I did not realize that God played such an important role in a marriage. Now that I do understand what real love is and that you have to have God in your life to show you what unconditional love is. I have always loved my wife and have never stopped loving her. Now I have a love for her that I have never felt before. It is stronger than it has ever been. I want to be with her all of the time when we are apart I think about her all of the time. Since I began The Love Dare I have prayed more than I ever have in my life and have been going to church more. I take time every day to read at least one chapter in the Bible usually I read more than one. I do want to thank God for changing my life and making me understand what true love is and for making me realize the most important things in life are God and family. My wife has told me that she loves me too that is something I had not heard since this happened. When she told me she loved me it sounded wonderful and it meant more to me than it ever had. I do not know if her love for me will ever be as strong as it was before. If not I will love her enough to make up for the love she has lost for me. My wife was saved in November of 2007. We have been reading the Bible together and we have been praying together. Both of us want to continue doing these things. A couple of days ago my wife told me that she wanted to make our marriage work and took me back even though I might not have deserved another chance. She has forgiven me and I guarantee that I will not need another chance. I will never let her down again and that I will never let God down again. Our wedding vows were for better or worse. The first 11 and a half years were great the last couple of months have been the worse the better is going to start now and continue for the rest of my life. I want to thank everyone that made Fireproof and The Love Dare possible but most of all I want to thank God and my wife for my new lease on life. I will prove that happily ever after does exist. Thank you. Billy
4/13/2009
I just want to thank everyone who had a part in Fireproof.I have been in a relationshipe for 6 years.About 3 weeks ago I got saved,along with my 2 sons.The man I am with always said he would never marry again.Well I knew I could not serve God fully by staying in a realtionship that was going no where.So I prayed and prayed.well oour church started this class based on the fireproof books and we are using them.on the third day of the book,My guy proposed to me in the ministers office.That is Gods doing.Because I told God I would leave him to make God happy,and I put it in his hands.And He blessed me wonderfully.My Fiance is a changed person thanks to God.I owe my whole life to God but want to thank the ones He inspired to put out the movie and books.May God bless you all!
4/13/2009
My husband and I have been married for five years and have two little girls. It's had it's ups and down and over the last year there has been a lot more yelling and less time for just the two of us. We watch Fireproof last Monday night and it was great. It was like something click and at the point I made my mind up that I was going to do the Love Dare on my husband. And the funny thing is that he was thinking that same thing. We have been working on day one because we knew what it was, till our books got here. The books got in today so I will be starting day two tomorrow. I can see it's going to be a big changes in my life. I have seen big change in the whole family. My kids are a lot happier and are listing better to us both. I think that everyone should watch Fireproof and do the book on top of it.
Amber
4/11/2009
if I starting telling you my story I wouldnt have enough room. We have been married for 11 years and we Have 5 children between the two of us. I find myself here because I think we are at the end of our ropes and I dont know what I can do to bring us back but before I give up or in I will do all that I can do in my humanly flesh that I can do to save my marriage. I want to take this challange and I will, please pray for us that what ever the outcome is that GOD gets the glory and that we find out some things about ourselves and each other that will help us. I want us each to be so close to GOD that we have to seek GOD to get close to one another. Love you all that had the courage to take this challange before me with me and behind me.I pray that the ultimate goal for us all is to get closer to God so that our lives will so shine that people( our spouses) will see the light in us. Thank you and I love you all.
Mrs. "T"
4/10/2009
My husband and I have been married now for 4 1/2 years. We have been together for 7 1/2 yrs. We have been on again off again for almost a yr now. We have 2 beautiful kids together. Right now we are going through more than i ever dreamed possible. Every time we get back together we end up apart once again. I have always believed in God but never truely the way were meant. Within this last time we seperated i just realized i can not do this on my own. I need to be right with God. He is the way for everything. I struggle with this everyday with people unknowingly trying to pull me back, but this time i pray for the strength to remain true. Even though our marriage has more problems than most, I still love my husband more than i ever have. Fireproof helped us once but we never followed through with the church part or being the christian people we were suppose to be. So of course we fell once again. And now im praying more than ever to be the person im meant to be. we dont go to church together. But i take our kids for us to go. i pray we will one day start going as a family and be the family God wants us to be. Neither one of us are perfect, only with God can we make it. I am going to keep walking the path God is leading me on. I cannot afford to get the Love Dave book at the moment. I am not willing to give up on our marriage, our life, and our family!!! Will everyone please keep us in your prayers?!!
brittney
4/10/2009
Friday, April 10, 2009. I have finished my Love Dare in a unique way. For two plus years, my loving wife and I, continue to be seperated by households- without contact- for an undetermined period, after restoration/reconcilation attempts;and, Pastoral counseling, came to a halt. I did this Dare without her presence, but speaking and doing each days challenges, as if she were there, to hear and experience it. I did the first half, and gave her the book-for encouragement, then we abruptly seperated. I prayed on the matter, and God's answer was : "Finish the Dare, you are not yet whom I want you to be." I picked up a second book, and continued from day (23-40). Throughout this Dare, I have always remembered, that this was about me changing, and drawing closer to God. One day, she will get this second half-and follow my journey toward a more Godly, christian walk. I have given it to my Pastor for safe keeping, until she seeks him out. This is some of what I've come to believe: I believe in God's promises, for He never lies. "I would have despaired, unless I had believed, that I would see the promises of the Lord, in the land of the living..." "I know the plans I have for you, they are for good and not disaster, to give you a HOPE and a FUTURE.""God has given us both His promise and His oath...we can hold on to his promise with steadfast confidence and assurance, like and anchor for our soul""Just as He promised, not one word has ever failed, of all His wonderful promises...""Keep on asking...keep on looking...keep on knocking, and the door will be open to you.""God blesses those wo patiently endure His testing.""Think about all he endured when sinful people did such terrible things to Him, SO THAT YOU DON'T BECOME WEARY AND GIVE UP""The wife God gives you, is your reward for all your earthly toil.""And we KNOW that God causes everything to work together for good...""Trust in the Lord with all your heart,do not depend on your own understanding...He will direct your path.""Be still and know that I am God." I know that fear, grows in the soil of doubt; and, is a direct result of taking my eyes off of God. Jesus, you have me right where you want me! My marriage is in Your hands-now. I ask, in Your Name, that You protect my family until YOUR time of restoration occurs. With tears on my face, and a longing in my heart.
Gary Vidovich
Springdale, Pennsylvania
Gary
4/9/2009
We are coming up on our 5th anniversary this May and have 2 beautiful boys ages 2 and 9 months. I have taken a year off work to be a stay-home- mom fufilling God's and my desire for my life. I never knew why God wanted me to be at home this long. Then it hit me like a mac truck. On March 13th, my husband told me that he feels like he is just going through the motins and has "moved on". Tears filled my eyes as he told me that the only reason he hasn't left was because we needed him financially. The next day after I watched him drive away with a woman who I now know is his "girlfriend" I thought my whole world was falling down around me. I watched the movie that day and knew that I had to do something to save our marriage.
Just like the wife in the movie, my husband is totally against the idea of any type of reconcilliaton. I am saved but I admit that being a working wife and mother had consumed my life and I no longer studied God's word and sought after him for guidance unless I was praying for something selfish. I bought the book the next day and started the dares. He resisted every advance and is still doing everything he can to shut me out of his life. Spending as much time as he can away from home and when he is at home I can only get his attention for a minute or two at a time.
I began to pray. I asked God for a sigh that there was still hope. He showed me that my husband is avoiding me. He still loves me but doesn't want to be around me because he is ashamed of himself. He is lost and confused. The woamn he's seeing is married too and she havs expressed her "love" for him. I know this man very well. God showed me that he feels trapped between what should be and what shouldn't. He doesn't want to hurt her anymore than what she's going through and it's easier to believe her promises for a great future together since they don't have a history like we do. He is focusing on the ways I have hurt him (non intentionally and most I was totally unaware of).
When I began the love dare, I thought it was about me and my husband and in some ways it is. Most importantly it is a dare to love God and take him at his word! All the areas in my relationship with my husband that I felt were missing, God has shown me that those were the same areas in my relationship with him that were missing. I now know wht I needed to stay home from work. To rekindle my love affair with the Lord. Something I would not have been able to focus on at work.
I am on Day 25. I have been experiencing a powerful move in my life and thank God for it. We talk frequently throughout the day about my fears and insecurities and he is constantly revealing new things to me. I wake every morning desiring to be with him. My husband and I are "functioning". But thanks be to God a breakthrough is on it's way. I don't know when or where but I am praising God everyday for my husband, his girlfriend, and this trial that has come to make me stronger. My praise is so high now that I might just explode when my husband sees God working in my life and humbles himself before the Lord. See God has shown me that THAT is why we're going through this.
I once told him that the one thing I could never forgive and would never tolerate wa infidelity. God has humbles me so on that. For better or for worse does not come with a disclaimer! I tell him I love him everyday "more today than I did yesterday" as he replies..."sure you do now or do you really?" I trust you Lord! God knew that I would come to him to pray for my husband and through this we'd both be redeemed.
So when I get discouraged I think on this, pray, cry, pour out my praises to God dry my face and keep going. So to all that have read this...be encouraged. The race is not given to the swift but to those who endure to the end. Lesson/dare#1...Love is patient. I am patiently waiting not on my husband but on God! In Jesus' name, AMEN!
4/9/2009
After watching this movie I started to think about how much our lives were reflected in this movie. Several years ago my husband then of 3 yrs was talking to women online and he did not realize that I knew about it. I held my tongue and poured my heart into my marriage. This is both of our 2nd marriages. I said to myself that i forgave him but I still wondered if he was talking to these women. I have given it over to God and have now truly forgiven him. I am on Day 4 of the Love Dare and I am hoping that we can make it through for our 3 kids.
4/8/2009
Well, I guess I am a little behind because I just finished watching the movie as I write this. My husband and I have been marriage for 5 years. We have four wonderful children the oldest two are from previous relationships of ours, the oldest girl is my daughter and the oldest boy is his son but we have twins together. I love my husband dearly however the intimacy is not strong on my end; it not anything that he has done and he tries. However, I have become so overwhelmed with school, work, and home that I do not have much time for me or us. I praying that as I take this 40 day Love Dare that God will open my heart to first accept myself as I am and then allow Him to flow through me and create a love that becomes "fireproof".
Markette
4/8/2009
My wife and I have been married for 12 and in 1 month it will be 13. On March 20, following the usual Friday evening Sabbath call by my mother-in-law, I found out that my wife had been contemplating moving out of our home and into a place of her own. She has been unhappy for quite sometime and decided that she needed to be on her own to see if she wanted to remain in the marriage. Of course, I knew we had issues but I was not truly keen to how hurt and sad she was really feeling. While I was devasted to hear this, I encouraged her to do so if it meant the possible saving of our marriage.
Yesterday I finally confided in a friend that we were separated. He encouraged me to watch the movie and to try to get her to watch it as well. I watch the movie lastnight and was very moved. The story line mirrored our lives almost exactly. We have no kids, one of us is in the medical field and have for the most part, the same primary issues. I thought that I was being a good husband. I now know that my wife has been lonely and truly needed me to re-affirm to her my love for her and that she was still beautiful. I took so much for granted and over time stop saying and doing a lot of the little things that are so important. I don't know if our relationship is salvageable but, I do know that I am going to give it my all and with God's help hopefully succeed.
Gary
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