STORIES
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5/9/2012
My husband and I have been together for 4 years married for 2 years. He recently ask me to move out said he did not love me anymore and he was tired of trying in our marriage. We have 4 children between the two of us. I love my husband more than anything in this world. I have not moved bc i believe we can conquer this hard time in our marriage. I made a vow to him and to God to be with him until the end and i intend on keeping that vow. I am currently on day 14 of the 40 day love dare and things are still not good. He will not tell me he loves me, shows me no affection and has completely shut down not to mention he will not participate in this love dare so i am doing this individually which makes this so hard. I still have alot of hope for our marriage bc we were very much in love.. any kind of support and encouraging words would be great!!
Kimberly
5/9/2012
I am 32yrs old and I am going to have my 3yr anniversary on the 15th of this month which is 6 days from now. I have the most caring, compassionate and beautiful Wife imaginable. She is a nurse, very driven, we have 5 children (the 3 oldest are from her previous marriage). Basically my wife and I are hard headed and it seems like we clash constantly. I had a 20+ ft. fall 2yrs ago and I seem to get irritated and angry at the smallest things. The anger leads to enormous fights and honestly neither of us are able to stop before hurtful things are said. We have both given our hearts to Jesus but the struggle with anger carries on for me. I watched Fireproof this morning with my wife and it was encouraging. I love my wife Melissa and our children deeply and it kills me that my anger is so hard to control. Basically I will try anything to root it out of me in hopes that our relationships and quality of nlife will improve. I believe that our God will meet me as long as I am pushing forward to his higher calling. Thank you for reading and God bless you all. -Curtis
curtis
5/2/2012
My name is Skip
My wife and I have been together for 15 years and married for 14 years. We have a 9 year old daughter and we have had 11 miscarriages. The first on was the hardest because she was 6 months along and we lost our son. We have been through quite a lot together. Recently I have been becoming more and more irritated by little things and I have been taking everything out on my family. We tribute the reason for us staying together is that when we got married we agreed divorce was not an option. this has been working for us but we have drifted apart due to my lack of compassion and her as well. We both believe in God and have just recently started going back to church. We watched Fire Proof last night and it really hit home for me. I realize I need to do something to get our marriage back on track so I started the Love Dare today. I noticed already a change in me and my family. I will write back after each week to show progress in this journey of mine. I have not let my wife know that I am doing this. Please pray for my family and I.
4/26/2012
We have been together 24 years, married 8 years, divorced, still living together. We have tried everything to make this work......and we just could not succeed, but was not willing to leave each other..........
We are on day 11..........we have found each other again and this is just getting better and better.
First thing we do in the morning is to read "current day" and discussed it and work on it.
I feel like a teenager that fell in love all over again.........
Put your heart and soul into this and you will see the change soon
Elna
4/25/2012
Hi my name is April my husband and i have been together 10 years married 9 years evr since we have been married we have had our ups and downs fights and arguments but here lately we have lost that love for one another im here today to find out where i went wrong and try to get my husband back by taking this 40 day journey, for those of you out there who are struggling to keep your marriage going don't give up the bible said til death do you part for better or for worse god will mmake it right.
April
4/24/2012
My husband and I have been married for only 8 months and together for 2.5 years. After our first date I knew I could marry him. But then the engagement came and so did the stress of forcing together two really close knit families. I built up resentment against his mother, and in turn he built up resentment against me. I have seen him change into someone I dont know. He is on the verge of leaving me all together. I have a short fuse and he doesnt understand that I am not mad at the fact he did something small, but I am just frustrated with our realtionship.He beleives that showing me he loves me involves putting a roof over my head and in return I should never get angry....but... We have big blow out fights once a month and it usually involves my lack of relationship with his family or the fact that I dont have an income (I am in law school). In addition I am very up tight and have been very controling when it comes to drinking, I just dont like it, but I need to learn to let go of the small things. I know he doesnt see that I am not the only one to blame for our situation. All the blame is put on me. I have to be the one to change... well maybe its true, and maybe a change in me will spark a change in him. So, I am starting the Love Dare today. I want to be a loving godly wife and rebuild that has been destroyed. I pray for strenght and and the ability to lenghten my fuse and embrace peace.
4/24/2012
My husband and I have been together for 14 years, married for 9. He had an affair while I was pregnant with our first daughter, and I have made every attempt to forgive and move forward. Sadly, I still have trust issues and he still engages in behaviors that make me think he is not trustworthy. We moved closer to his family and life long friends, which has resulted in me staying home while he's out with his friends. We both have busy lives and I throw myself into work and hobbies to mask the loneliness I feel. He now says there is no connection between us. That I choose my hobbies over my family. So now I am fighting to save a marriage. My counselor does not believe that he has any desire to change. So she is preparing me to face my life without him. The lovedare is the only thing I have found that I can get tangible activities that make me feel like I am working towards saving my marriage.
After telling my counselor all of the issues we've had, she asked me why I want to stay. I answered: "Because I committed to love him for better or worse, and it doesn't seem like it could get much worse. Plus... I committed to him. Whether he stays committed to me, or if he continues to love me, it doesn't change my love for him, or my committment to him."
I hope I can help him find his way back to me...
4/22/2012
i would like to know if nthe dare works if the other person just moved out and should i continue please give me suggestions
sonia
4/22/2012
My husband and I have been married for 23 years. It has not been easy and I can tell you that there have been several times that I almost left him. I never did out of fear of the unknown and stubbornness. We do get along much better now, but we still lack closeness that I would love to have and I know I am as much to blame for that as he is. Another issue is we both take each other for granted. He is a wonderful man, but neither of us Ever tell the other how we feel, and yes, I am as guilty of this as he is.
I literally just started back to church today. I have felt the Lord calling me back and am trying the Catholic church (my husband is Catholic). I have waited over a year to finally attend a mass because I was really hoping that my husband would agree to go; however he will not, and I do realize that it can't be forced. All of that said, I just finally watched the movie Fireproof and wow! So much of that film hit home, we have been there more than once and I don't want to go back and I want to gain that closeness.
I have just downloaded the ITunes version of The Love Dare and am going to do this...once my husband returns home from his business trip. This really sounds like common sense, but I guess it's just not as common as one would think, not in today's society at least. Anyway, I'm really excited to get started. Thank you so much for this film and the book!
Angela
4/21/2012
hello my name is Sonia and i have been married to my husband for 10yrs we have 1 biological son and 2 from previous relationship and he has 3 of his own they all live with their mothers 2 of them sometimes come down for xmas and summer vacation... Well my husband went to prison in 1/2003 after our son was born he is 9 now..well 4-5 yrs he was gone i cheated and lied,direspected him, and the guy i cheated with i thought i was in love with him and i briefly was married to him but i was still married to my current husband. I send my husband divorce papers but i didnt sign them and in a way im kind of glad i didnt...but my husband found out and we decided to stay togther after i begged and pleaded i felt so ashamed and embarrased and then i started going to chucrch and told my pastor everything. so got back together in 2009 and to me everything was fine he found a job really fast and things were great..Its now 2012 and he claims that he cant forget how i treated him and lied to him so he left 4/20/2012 he says he loves me but the feeling isnt there anymore im sooooooooooooooo hurt and i feel so much pain. i love him and i want my husband back.he also said he needs space and see whats out there i started the dare a few weeks ago its a little challenging when the spouse isnt here for u to do the dare. Please helpm if u have any suggestions...i go to church but he doesnt he puts work in front ... he knows God and the word he just wants to do his own thing i guess....i pray to God he builds me and heal me and brings us closer to him... Thank you for reading God Bless
sonia
4/21/2012
I have been with my husband since i was 17. so.. 7 years at the end of april. The past few months have been very rough and I havent felt happy in the relationship in a while. I feel very alone in it and I have brought that to his attention. He works out of town 5days a week and is only home on the weekend. And when he is home he is sitting on the couch or playing soccer with his friends an hour away in another town. We have 3 little boys age 6,5, and 1. I am taking the dare to save my marriage as when i said I DO I meant forever.
desharia
4/21/2012
well, when I first googled this site, I thought I would be reading stories about how the Love dare changed marriages. Instead, I am reading a lot about broken marriages.
My marriage is broken as well and I am on day 27 in the love dare.
My husband and I havent even been married for two years. It has been hard because he keeps saying he doesn't know what he wants or if he loves me.
I ask why he is hanging on and he doesn't know.
He has seen that I am working really hard and he has admitted he has not done anything.
I challenged him this morning to put his all into this marriage for the next couple of weeks including going to a Christian marriage retreat. He actually accepted this challenge.
I have been praying for restoration in our marriage everyday and that God will shake my husband from his sinful behavior.
I am not perfect either so I have also been praying that God will make me the woman he wants me to be as well as the best wife for my husband.
God has blessed me so far in this challenge by bringing me wonderful work opportunities and great Christian people to be around me during this trying time. I have a whole support group around me.
I like to say whatever God's will is will be but I know he hates divorce as well.
Pray for us as well as all the other couples on this site.
(there is a girl he works with that he cannot stop texting after hours and it has become a huge problem and I have asked him to stop and he will not. he keeps saying it is work related but he deletes every message that comes across. I had a feeling that when we moved out to this new city, that if anything happened between my husband and I, that girl would some how be involved. I have asked him to stay away from her but it has come down to our marriage on the fence and we literally have like three weeks to decide if my husband wants to continue this marriage or not)
Amanda
4/18/2012
Hi my name is Vida. My husband and I have been together for 16 years of which we'vebeen married 7. Recently we had a huge fight and I was told that if I don't change my attitude he would end our marriage. This was very painful to hear as we both have our own attitude problem but all was blamed on me. I have started the love dare today and I am prepared to anything possible to save this marriage as I cannot imagine a life without him.
4/17/2012
I've been with my husband since 2000. We have problems; sometimes big, sometimes small....but I know there has to be more than what our marriage is right now. I know God can do ALOT more. I am starting this LOVE DARE today and am really looking forward to it. I hope everyone here the best and I will also pray that God gives us all strength to continue no matter how hard it gets.
Noemi
4/15/2012
My name is Rachel. Me and my husband have been together 3 yrs in Aug and married 2 yrs this past Feb. I knew just from talkin to him that he was my soulmate. He was a marine and I moved to NC to be with him. At first we got into church and prayed before meals and things were good. We had a bumpy beginning when I saw he had cheated online. He has an addiciton. But God was helping us. Then the devil worked on us and we both allowed it and I stopped church. I lost God. In March he moved out because we were still on same vicious cycle. Him with devils temptations and me with trust, anger and fear. I recently argued with him and basically forced him to say he doesnt love me anymore even though he had just told me he did earlier that day. I regret it but I dont feel in my heart he meant it. I decided to find God for both me and him until he is ready. I will pray for him and us and fight the devil for our love. I know we can get through this pain if we just let it all go to god. Im doing this for us. Please pray.
Rachel
4/14/2012
It was 1984. I was 14 years old and new to the neighborhood. It was the middle of summer vacation and I had just returned home from Louisville Kentucky after spending some time with my dad. My mom surprised me after picking me up from the bus station by driving past our old house and telling me that we no longer lived there. It seemed as if that road to our new home was so long. Over the course of a few weeks, I met a new friend. She and I were walking through our courtyard one midsummer’s afternoon when I saw him. He came zooming past us on his bike; a silver BMX mongoose with black magwheels! And although he zoomed, my eyes locked on him and I stared at him for what seemed to be a lifetime in slow motion. “Who is that?” I asked my friend like a hungry lion on the prowl for food! “Who him? That’s just Eric.” my friend said. Well, he wasn’t just Eric to me. As far as I was concerned, that was my soul mate; the reason for being in that particular place at that particular time. He was why God chose to move me from all that I knew to this place where I had only one friend. I loved Eric from the very first time I laid eyes on him as he bounced and popped around on his bike doing tricks. He had braces, he was skinny but well defined, and he had a bushy antiquated afro. The girls teased me when they found out that I had a thing for the “boy with the afro and braces”! But it didn’t sway me. I knew I loved him. I just knew it. Its 2012 now (wow!). We been together for 28 years, married for 13, separated for 6 of those 13 and back together for 4. We have 2 children; 1 biologically his and the other from a relationship that I encountered when I was younger and before marriage. I must admit that I still love my husband. He has done some terrible things that have hurt me so much and as a result, I have also done things to hurt him. If it had not been for the love of Christ in my life, I don’t think loving him or anyone else for that matter would be possible. we have endured many hardships; abortions and then the inability to have the son we both desired since we were youths, drugs, alcohol, disloyalty, adultery, disrespect etc. however, it seems like we are plagued by many of the same things over and over. 4 years ago, I gave my life to Christ. He didn’t. And since then, life has been a struggle. I am so tired of beating a dead horse. I have tried everything in MY power to restore our marriage, our friendship, our companionship and to no avail, just when I think we are close to a breakthrough, one of the above mentioned hardships come into play! I am ready to break these fetters once and for all and I now know that it has to be through Gods strength and word that I do so. So, my friend as I travel this journey and you have read my story, please pray for restoration and courage to endure. In Jesus Name!!
T
4/13/2012
Brett and I have been together almost 5 years. It truly was love at first meeting. He wasn't my type - he was the tall, a bit dorky looking kind of man. But he stole my heart. I moved to away from home to live with him, after only a few months of dating. Life was so perfect. He is a good man. But he was never there for me emotionally. Over 2 years of being together, I ventured out and met someone who was there for me emotionally. We would talk, and eventually I spent a lot of time with this man. Nothing sexual ever occurred. But it destroyed the trust Brett and I had. A few months, I decided that I didn't want that - I stopped all contact and began trying to rebuild with Brett. Things went good. Great. Then drinking got involved. He began drinking every night and playing video games. He never paid me any attention. I would sit on the couch, wishing he would come sit beside me. I did all the house work, and I began to feel left out or unappreciated. I had a friend I had known for 3 years at work, and we would talk about our relationships. One day we met outside of work, and started doing that often. I didn't think much of it due to the fact I felt that Brett wouldn't even miss me or acknowledge the fact that I wasn't home sitting on the couch as he played video games. But it again took a toll on our relationship. 2 months later, I decided to stop contact with my friend to try and make things right with Brett. Now he told me 2 days ago he doesn't want a relationship with me right now. We live together. We have things together. We have a life we build together and I am so heart broken. I feel badly, sick to my stomach for the things I have done, but I wish he would understand my point of view. I'm not trying to justify what I did, I have apologized many times. So today begins my journey on this 40 days and I want everyone's support and prayers that this works out. He truly is a good man and I love him so much. I want it to work.
Dana
4/13/2012
My husband and I have been married for almost a year. Our one year anniversary will be on May 14th. We have been together for over 7 years. We have been separated now for almost 2 months. I am doing the Love Dare on my own.
Our separation came out of nowhere. For the most part, I believed we were both happy. Yes, we have our problems. I believed us to be survivors of infidelity. I found out almost 2 years into our relationship that my husband (then boyfriend) was cheating on me. We agreed at the time to stay together. Fast forward to this year to about a week or so after my birthday, my husband sits me down and confesses that he has be unfaithful to me the entire time we've dated. He had slept with 8 women (including the one I knew about) over the course of our dating years. His last infidelity was 2 months before our wedding. He assured me that he had not been unfaithful while we've been married, but was concerned that he couldn't remain that way and wanted to separate. I am reluctantly going along. Some would not understand nor agree with why I am doing the Love Dare. I guess you just have to know him like I know him. I see the good in him--the good that predominantly is him.
I have a strong desire to stay committed to our marriage. I believe whole-heartily that God can create miracles and restore marriages, if and only if, we trust Him and are committed to building a foundation in Him. I struggle with the dares each day as I am torn between pushing my husband away (as he would want me to do) and completing each dare to its potential. Every day I am reluctant to complete the challenge, I am drawn back to the book. I am reminded constantly in many ways that God does not want us to give up. Marriage is sacred; it is meant to be forever. With that said, I know God does not want me to subject myself to the evil and the pain that is overwhelming my husband as he struggles to deal with the pain inside of him. I know God does not want me to follow him down the wrong path, but to instead to love him where he is, but at a distance. I can love him in my heart, support, and pray for him. I am committed to seeing this challenge at least through the end of the 40 days, and I hope to take what I learn and apply it to my life as a whole.
I ask for prayers. Prayers for me to give me strength, prayers for my husband to really find God, and prayers that God restore our marriage. God is good.
Breanna
4/12/2012
My wife and I have been together for 18yrs. We will be married for 14 years in July. We have 2 great kids, 12 and 7. I have loved my wife through words and not through actions or emotions. Coming to realize what a jack *** I was for a long time. I thought by supporting her and the family, taking care of the kids would be enough. I missed so many signs in the past few years, that she was looking for a bit of support, time and motivation from me. I took it as she was nagging to me and have taken this marriage for granted. Just like the Fireproof movie. Work, work and work came before my relationship with god and my wife. We have had issues in the past. We recogonized it, work on it for a few months, everything was fine, and then back to the same old story. You can't change your ways, unless you change your heart, and have a relationship with god. 2 months ago my wife said she wanted a divorce. It hurt so much, becasue I thought everything was ok. She told me all the issues that she has with me and this marriage. I was lost, shocked, angery, sad......all over the place. We are both still in the same house, but we sleep seperate rooms. Its a lonely feeling. I started the 40 Day Love Dare. Today is day 2. Along with this, I have created a relationship with god too. Praying every day, church on Sunday's and bible study on Wednesday. Couseling once a week now too. I so love my wife, and love myself. Change is a great feeling, but the struggle to get there is difficult.
Remember this "things will get worse, before they get better" Keep a positive attitude and move forward in your journey.
Please keep us in prayer.......
Thank you
4/12/2012
I completed the love dare a mont and a day ago. It was very hard to do and some days I did not want to do the dare. I kept a journal and logged the dare what I did and how it turned out. This was a great release for me because my wife's and my problems were my fault. I however did not want to give up on her even when she took her wedding ring off and told me she wanted a divorce. I turned to the love dare. Evacuee I saw the movie fireproof and I thought it could help me understand my wife better. I am so glad I did I made it the forty days and in my journal I would write the day on the top of the page I did that to day 52 and I then thought I'm on my own now. There is no more love dare to to read it is now time to do it. Ecause you learned so much over the past 40 days. So I stopped keeping track of the days and started living what I learned. I held all the values I now understand that my wife needed so much. I am not out of the woods yet but we are going to counseling now and talking again and I think in time we will be ok.
The long and short is this opened my eyes and made think about my splice and what she needed. I told her only a week ago that I did this I did not tell her what I did yet one day I may let her read the journals. I suggest this book to anyone take is seriously and even if the worst case is enevitable you will learn a lot about yourself and it will help you become a better person.
Keep your faith and pray for guidance love forgivness and healing.
Brian
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