STORIES
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9/2/2012
It's been just over 3 months that my husband and father of our 5 small children walked out the door. When he first left, we thought I might even be pregnant with our 6th baby, something that he said he really wanted because he loved me and our children dearly. Turns out, he was miserably unhappy here with me because I wasn't being sensitive enough and lived my life out of fear, which had a negative impact on those closest to me.
While I've not yet read this book, 40 Day Love Dare, I have just placed an online order for it and did see the movie Fireproof a few years ago and recently again, I have some hope in it educating me in what my role is supposed to be like as a Christian wife. I have no idea how things will turn out in my life, but I'm desperate for God to use this nightmare that I'm slowly walking through as a time in my life to be humble and educated for His purposes. In the past week, He's already shown me so much because I've finally submitted to His quiet voice.
Praying for everyone here who is enduring marital trials and hope you all keep your focus on the KING!
8/31/2012
Over two months ago my husband had an affair. Never in my wildest dream would I pictured him saying he wanted a divorce to be with this other woman. God prompted me to try the love dare. And at first going into the love dare it was about me. I would pray "God, change his heart. Look what he has done to me. Make this work." And slowly and gently God revealed how wrong I was. Though my husband was wrong in committing his sin on having relations outside our marriage, I still have to offer him the same love and grace God gives me. Talk about eating loads amount of HUMBLE PIE. God shown me and revealed to me the errors of my ways and during the Love Dare my pray became that my husband would know who God was and how much God loves him. Allowing God to take control of the situation and taking it day by day allowed me to trust God in a huge way. On Day 20 my husband decided to move back in and cut off all connections with her. God worked in His Way and His timing! Everyday is a challenge. Forgiveness is an everyday thing. But our relationship with Christ and putting HIM first is the foundation we needed. Look at it as a triangle. Christ is on the top point and you both are on each side of the triangle. If one moves closer to Christ while the other one doesn't it makes it hard. But when you both move towards Christ you will meet each other in a place that is absolutely Amazing! We've had our ups and downs. Some days are better than most, but it's a work in progress and so worth it. My biggest advice is you can't begin to love your spouse until you know what God's love is first. Really examine your heart and I believe that God will reveal it.
Amanda
8/29/2012
My husband and I are going on 3 years of marriage. We have 2 children at home. A 6 year old from my previous marriage and a 2 year old of our own. Almost a year ago my husband had an affair. We had seperated after the affair because he wasent sure what he wanted. After about 7 months of working things out and many counciling sessions we have both agreed its time for a divorce. Im having trouble convencing myself that this is the right decision given that we both tell eachother we love eachother everyday, are able to talk to one another, hug and kiss eachother, live under the same roof and sleep in the same bed together. I have asked him if he really thinks this decision is the right thing to do and he believes it is. I know I have to pull a little harder on my faith and give our marriage some extra TLC.
8/22/2012
in 2000 my first wife left me. I prayed for a miricle and i believe God gave Sharon to me. I got married to Sharon in 2002 and we decided to start a new life together in the UK. I was previously married for 16 years and have three beautiful children. Sharon anf I have worked together to make new lives for ourselves and by the grace of God have been able to do so. We both started slipping away from fellowship, the church and God.
I blamed Sharon for not loving me like a wife should love her husband and not showing me love and affection. Wrong! I know, know. What ive done is drive her away and got her thinking that she cannot love me the way I want her to. Ive done some running away from the rejection instead of working at our relationship with God and one another.
Just recently, 3 weeks ago, while in prayer with a frien I felt drawn to ask for the forgivness of my sins. Ive done this and now see that I was only pushing Sharon away by not following our God and Farthers example on how to love.
A visiting speaker at a local church suggested that i watch Fire Proof and told me it was about a Fire Fighter. I am a Fire Fighter and curiosity got the better of me. I ordered a copy and watched it yesterday afternoon. The content really touched my heart and I cried with joy, sorrow, regret and just a deep sence of knowing that God is in control.
My Sharon has been asking for space and wants to be able to just be single to live her life as she sees fit. I do not want to move out and dont want her to either.
I started day one yesterday. My wife questioned how we would handle seeing other people to which I answered. "I class myself as married and I will not be seeing anyone else.
To any of you reading this please join me in praying for God's will to be done. Not only in Sharon and I, but also in the lives of all of the mariages under attack.
Mike
Michael
8/21/2012
So we've been having some issues lately and I thought thats was to be expected after 14 years of marriage. Man was I wrong. Few days ago she kept asking me to move out, said she needed some time to clear her head and think things through, "maybe we just need a break" she said. Turns out she had already fallen in love with someone else. She lied to him, told him she was single. I mostly blame myself though. After reading first few pages of 40 Day Love Dare thats when I realized I was doing everything wrong. Im on day 5, we currently live under the same roof, we have 2 beautiful children, 6 yr old girl and 3 yr old boy, we dont say much to each other, and I suspect she still may be trying to work things out with "him" since HE told her to get lost after finding out we are still married and living toghether. After this, she just lost it with me, thats when she said it "I dont love you anymore, my heart belongs to someone else!!!"....OUCH!...She also wants me out of the house but I told her I wont be the one to leave our home and our children. I told her she could leave and that I would gladly take her back with an open heart no matter what. Im currently on day 4, I called her and asked how she was doing and if she needed anything or if there was anything I could do for her. She asked if I could loan her 20 bucks. I said " you're still my wife, just pull what you need from our account, thats your money too". This is really the hardest thing I have had to endure. I feel like I've lost her forever, Like I said we dont say much to each other and I cant stand thinking she's with him when she stays out of the house all day on her off days. But at same time, I have hope since she's still here. I recently turned to Christianity through my sister in law, and that has giving me more hope. This all started on the 14th, today is the 21st, we still dont talk at all really and she wont reply to my loving texts. It's way too soon to really start seeing any results I would imagine, day 4, but sometimes I feel hopeless. I'm learning a lot through this book. Im thinking about burning a few copies of the audio book and giving out to my friends and family. I pray everyday all goes well and remain hopeful for the most part.
8/21/2012
My husband and I have been married for almost 5 years. We have been separated for almost 3 years. I recently watched fireproof and it prompted me to get a copy of The Love Dare. I am still contemplating trying it. Do you think it is too late? He already has a girlfriend but still says he loves me but not that he is in love with me. We have a 4 year old son.
8/15/2012
I have recently just lost my husband, he moved in with our friend (another guy) He said he fell out of love with me. I remember we watched this movie a few years ago. And I am willing to do anything for my husband, and our marriage. I am going to give the Love Dare, a go. I know if might not work, but it is worth a shot, I can't stop fighting for what I know is there. We have been married for 6 years. I won't let us fail, God only knows, and God willing things will change. And if I have been seeing the signs already. Lord please guide me.
8/13/2012
My faince and I have been together for three years and two months ago I watched the movie FireProof. Lately all we do is fight and argue and it hurts to do that with the one I love. I jsut started the love dare and I am on day two. I feel this will not be an easy joureny but it is one I must take if I have any hope of safing my realtionship.
Rebecca
8/11/2012
George, I have the same story. Except we have been married for 10 years and I am the he is walking out on with three small children. I ask the lord to change my husbands heart to follow him as well. I will pray for you and your wife. I know the lord will work his magic if we only allow him to. God Bless!
8/8/2012
I have been married to my wife for 14 years. We both know the Lord have have served him in many different capacities. We have gone through a lot in our marriage. We lost a set of twins fairly early in our marriage, which was a huge struggle. Just a couple of years ago, my wife told me that she was never really in love with me. Now, I know that love is action and the feeling side of love is temporal, but that was a blow. Since that time, things have been pretty rough around our home. Problems have popped up all over the place and my wife really wants nothing to do with me. I know that I have been selfish and hard to deal with, but I have tried to show her love and she just won't accept it. I have been spending these past couple of years consumed with loneliness. I have only seen my wife's faults and have constantly let her know about it. Don't get me wrong, my wife has been doing things that she shouldn't and in many ways has neglected me and our family. And for everything that she has done, she doesn't see wrongdoing at all. I have been trying to play the role of the Holy Spirit in her life - not a good thing to do.
I have struggled with this so much! However, I just watched Fireproof again the other day and cried like a baby, wishing I could have an ending like in the movie, but I realized I haven't been loving my wife with a selfless love. I have been too concerned with what I have not been getting in our marriage and not concerned for her. I have just been as wrong as her. I struggled with the idea of doing the love dare because I feel like she needs to change and be the wife and mother she should be, but God has gotten ahold of my heart. This morning I decided to take the Love Dare. I can't say that I don't want to see a storybook ending. I want my wife to fall in love with me again. But I have to say that I want to become the kind of man that she needs whether or not I ever win her heart back. I want to show her the love of Christ even if I have to continue going through this life without her love and care. I am committed to my wife and to our marriage. I am committed to serving our living God. Please pray that God would give me the strength to change my heart regardless of the outcome of my marriage.
8/5/2012
My wife and I married in 2003. We have 2 beautiful boys and were trying to have a third. I have always been a relegious person, and I was fortunate enough to grow up in a house that believed in the Lord and went to church every sunday. Even though I had a house that believed in the Lord I still had a difficult childhood. My father was 2 different people. There was the "perfect" man that everyone else saw, and then there was the man that we knew at home. Early on in life I learned that I could lie to get out of trouble. I have carried that thought process into my adult life, and because of it I have hurt my wife over and over again. For the past 7 years I have lied to her about smoking and dipping. She has caught me on about 8 different occasions. My marrage is in real trouble. We watched the movie a couple years ago. I know that my lying is distroying everything and everyone around me and that I need serious help. I also know that God can help me through anything if I'll just follow him. I ask that you pray for me and my family and ask God to help me with me daily struggle.
Joshua
7/21/2012
I recently watched Fireproof as a recommendation from a friend. I laughed, cried, and thought very hard as to what part I was playing in the downfalls my marriage was going through. My wife and I have been married 13yrs and have 3 beautifule children. I am really interested in living for Christ and having a household built on the foundations of the Word of God, she on the other hand isn't. Through watching the movie and hopefully reading the book I want Christ to change as to draw her to Him! So today I start day 4 of the Love dare and I know that with the Lord's help all with work out. Please keep George and Karon in your prayers as I am praying for all of you!
George
7/19/2012
Me and my husband fell in love in 2002. We dated for almost five years before we got married. Since then we have had a wonderful life together. He has been there for me through everything. I lost both of my parents three years apart from each other and we lost a child, our angel baby Luke. We have always been able to work through whatever problems we have had. Before we started dating I was headed down the wrong path. I used to party, do drugs and give my body to other men. Once I met my husband that all changed. I was drawn to him and could not get him out of my head. He was a Christian and I wanted nothing to do with that but for some reason I couldn't stay away from him. Once we started dating I changed everything. I believe it was Jesus calling me slowly because I let go of those things one by one. I wanted too be good enough for my husband. He did not want to marry me unless I became a Christian and I fought it for years. I eventually got baptisted but not for the Lord, just so he would marry me. We got married in 2006 and by that time I was leaning more toward the Lord. I loved Jesus and wanted to be His. Three days after we got married my beloved father passed away from cancer. I was only 22. Instead of blaming God I threw myself at Him and dedicated my life to Him. I love Jesus Christ and I know He loves me. Right after the death of my baby in october 2011, I started questioning God and getting father away from Him. I also started being hateful with my husband and our two beautiful children. We started growing apart. Then one day I asked my husband to let me borrow his phone and he tried every way possible to keep me from seeing it. Finally he gave it to me and acted weird. I got away from him so I could see what was going on because he was acting so suspicious. We have internet on our phones and he had been looking at pornagraphy. When I confronted him about it he broke down and told me it was something he had been struggling with for years. I prayed and God told me to forgive him and not judge him because we all fall short and I was reminded of what I have done. We prayed together and he said that God has taken that from Him. I have felt lead to do the 40 day dare and feel it will help us get closer to God and with each other. I love my husband and I want his happiness. Please pray for us as we go on this lifelong journey.
7/15/2012
On September 19th 2009 I married my total opposite. Before this marriage we were together as a couple for 8 years. We been threw a lot of bad and good experiences. We managed to get threw many things, such as, being young parents starting at 17yrs old for her and 18yrs old for me. In the beginning it was very very rough, as for me it was the beginning of a whole new life style. I had to prepare myself for fatherhood and playing a part as a provider. As for her well, she was still in high school. From many doubts from outsiders saying we werent going to make it, she was going to drop out, I was going to not do so well as a father etc..To overcoming all doubts and adjusting to this new life, we happen to stick together, work together because WE is all WE had.
During her pregnancy,I found a job with the help of her father. It didnt pay much but it was a start, it was enough to save up and buy a car and minor things for us. I then got layed off after 3months of working at the landscape company. During that time, I helped out as much as I can, with a car i bought in the winter with no heat and it had only one gear. I still managed to take to her to school every morning. Then i found another job at a hollywood video and became shift leader. Where she ended up having our daughter in April of 02'. At the point while she was on maternity leave. At times I would go to her school get make up work, take her to school every morning while I took care of the baby. I was later released from that job, and I had to quickly find a solution. in the mean time,she finally graduated! After that she moved in with me while i was living with my mom. But who wouldve thought that was the beginning of the hardwork and rough times. After a few months I decided to go back to school and pick the barber trade.
After a year or so we ended up spliting up going our seperate ways, she found new love and job wiht a bank and I continued to study to where i graduated in Dec of 2003. Got involved with lots of women but none that was serious as cynthia. I then got a job at the same barbershop that was cutting my hair since i was 12. After that I stayed as full time barber. I then moved out my moms home and moved into an apt, and had custody rights and spent time with daughter every other weekend and some during the week. That was a rough time in my life. Whatever little money i made i used to buy food for my daughter, daycare and clothing for her. I just ate stuffing for months, until i learned how to cook, and make more money. It was a major sacrifice i had to over come but i did. After several years go buy i moved to another apt and then eventually a house. Cynthia (my wife) was then evicted from her apt, lost her job and split with her certain boyfriend at the time, so instead of allowing her to be homeless i took on the responsablity for caring for her. Under one circumstance, we had to work it out and in 2005' she was pregnent with our son. Stage 2 of our rough life had begun. She started to hang around the wrong crowds and doing the wrong things to where we split up again, but this time it was temporary then she went back to school to study to become a medical Assistant. When she realized her "friends" wasnt really her "friends" we became one again. Then i lost my house and moved back in with my mom.
In Oct 2005 she gave birth to our son, we tend to work things out and she moved back in with me at my moms. After a year goes by we both decided to move in an apt together, I left barbering full time to part time and became a personal trainer and strength coach for professional fighters. We always managed to get by, I worked very very hard with all 3 jobs to make sure we still had heat, food, clothes and bills paid.
After a year in this new apt things went wrong with the building to where it wasnt safe to live in, so we moved out and found a much bigger and better place to live. I continued to work my 3 jobs. once we lived there for 2 years we decided to get married and on September 19th 2009 we got married. She then gave birth in June of 10' to our daughter.
During our marriage life we tend to purchase our 1st house. Now we are happy at times but we still tend to struggle, fight and are going threw rought times. We decided to stick to our vows we promised before god and work it out no matter what. So here we are at the Rebirth of a New Beginning!
robert
7/13/2012
My husband and I have been married for one year. He and I met at a concert at my local church were I saw him worship the Lord with his hands in the air. I thought it was so attractive for a man to have a strong desire to want to know the Lord personally. Immediately, I wanted to get to know him and the experience was amazing. He has a 3 almost four year old son, that I also love so much. After dating for four months, we got married early because of our struggle with sexual sin. I knew that with him and the Lord we were going to be alright even though we weren't financially stable. A year past, and we have endured a lot. My in-laws, money, school, jobs, living from place to place. After our wedding anniversary date my husband came clean to me. Telling me of all the things that has been going on in his life secretly. Its been tough for him, but one thing I do know it that what God has joined together let no man separate. Right now we don't live together because he has returned to school on his own. It's hurtful sometimes but I believe that God is going reconcile our marriage even though I don't see it at the moment. I love my husband very much. Fireproof was one of our favorite Christian films and we bought the love dare while we were still dating. I'm glad that we bought that book even though I hoped I never had to use it. Now that I am where I am in my marriage, I choose to walk in the love dare challenge daily with my husband. Its a bit difficult with him being away, but the true challenge is to show the character of Christ in my love for my husband even though he may not love me right now. I will not give up on my marriage, I know God has placed my husband in my life for a reason and a purpose. I will not give up on my husband even though he may not deserve it to others. But when I gave my vows to the Lord, it was "for better or for worst" and that is my commitment Stay encouraged couples, husbands, wives. Lean on God day by day. Pour your heart out to him. Stay committed to His Word as to how to stand and let him fight within your marriage.
7/11/2012
My husband and I have been married for twenty-seven years and will be together as a couple for twenty-nine years on July 15. A few years ago we started having problems because there were many changes going on in our lives at the time. Our youngest daughter had just graduated, my husband was offered a promotion within the company that he worked for, but it would require us moving out of state away from our family. I added to the fire by deciding to go back to school and get a Bachelor's degree. The stress was overwhelming, and I made some bad choices along the way that put extra strain on our marriage. We could not afford to see a marriage counselor, so I did some research and found the movie "Fireproof" and its connection with the "Love Dare." I believe that God led me to it, and I tried to get my husband to do it with me, but he absolutely refused. I wanted our marriage to work, so I did the "Love Dare" on my own. At first it was hard, and I thought, "yeah right," this is not going to work unless we both do it. However, I was able to also come across some CD's of the "Love Dare" and listened to them during my long drives to work and school. At the end we came together as husband and wife, we created our own "date night" each week, and things seemed to be working out for us.
I just recently graduated from college with my Bachelor's degree, and the grant money that helped pay my tuition and our monthly expenses also came to an end. This next part is truly difficult to admit, but I messed up our finances more than once because of a gambling addiction. One day I was feeling particular low and decided that going to the casino was a great idea even though I knew the pitfalls and hazards. I spent all of our money that we had just budgeted for the month, and without a job to replace the lost income, we had to start over from scratch. Needless to say, my husband was furious and demanded an immediate separation and divorce. We fought for several days and then decided to make things work because deep down we really do love each other, and we know that God brought us together, and expects us to honor our marriage vows. Today, I watched "Fireproof" again, and I am determined to find a job to supplement our income until I am offered a teaching position. I am going to do the "Love Dare" again because it has been a few years, and I am going to ask my husband to participate. Even if he chooses not to I will do it on my own and with God's help and intervention our marriage will be better than it ever has been.
7/10/2012
This is day five of the Love Dare on my husband of almost 12 years (please read my story from July 6, 2012). I am loving it and, I dare say, so is he! This really does work, especially if you dedicate each day to God and ask Him to be with you every step of the way! I'm not saying it's easy, but it IS worth it! If you haven't taken up the challenge yet, please do so! You won't regret it! What have you got to lose?
Lisa
7/10/2012
My wife and I have been married for 7 years and she recently told me she wanted a divorce. The reason was that ever since I left the Army, I started to change for the worse. I got extremely lazy, wouldn't complete tasks around the house that I had done in the past. Gained weight and got to where i didn't care about myself anymore. My wife is a great woman and over the past year has told me that my actions were driving her away. I unfortunately wouldn't listen to her cries and didn't change. She works full time and the deal was that I would maintain the house, cleaning, laundry, all the things that she did when i worked full time. She came home from work on July 3rd and told me she wanted a divorce and then packed some clothes and took the kids to her parents house. Since then she has already got papers, filed and we have our initial hearing on August 1st. She tells me that she loves me due to the kids and the fact that I am their father, but not in love with me like when we first met.
I still love her with all my heart and with all that has happened the past week, now realize that I need to change for her and myself to be a better person. With all that she has already done, getting a place of her own either this week or next, is it too late?
Michael
7/6/2012
I have been married for 7 years, together with my wife for 9 overall. We have 2 beautiful children together (a 3 year old daughter and a 1 year old son). We also have 3 beautiful children from her first marriage (all girls- a 15 year old, and twins who are 12 years old). We have struggled like most financially and living paycheck to paycheck. I recently found out that my wife was having an affair with another man. I have noticed a change in her feelings towards me for months and suspected something was going on. Needless to say it was a heart shattering experience as I thought she would never do this to me. She has said that all the struggles along with having children early on and starting over again became overwheling and our marriage was deteriorating and started to crumble around us. An experience like this definately opens your eyes and gives you a new perspective on things. I realized some of my short comings and things I could have done better to provide for my wife and family. At the time of me discovering the affair I had already decided to join a Christian church encouragement group to stand for my marriage seeing that things were going the wrong way. I since have commited myself to GOD and have asked him to mold me into the father, husband, and man I need to be for my family. It's a day to day struggle as she still lives at home but now in a seperate room and still sees the other man. I have decided with GODS help and guidance to fight for my marriage and our 5 children and most of all for my wife. I know they all need me now more than ever. I know in time GOD will restore our marriage. She did recently tell me that she does not love me anymore and that she never really did. She later said she loved that I was so committed to her as her boyfriend before me was not. I went the whole 9 yards with an engagement in Vegas and a great wedding and honeymoon, bought a house together all in a short period of time. My feeling is that if she loved me once before for being committed she will love me again for committing to fighting for our marriage and the well being of our children and grandchildren and setting an example for generations. I believe in the vows we made and that marriage IS NOT such a disposable thing like it is today. I love my wife with all my heart and will not give up on her or our family. I just bought the Love Dare book as it was recommended to me by a church friend. I plan on starting with it tomorrow. I will keep all of you in my prayers and please do the same for me.
7/6/2012
My husband and I will celebrate our 12th wedding anniversary on October 14. We have been together since August of 1997, and have known each other since 1977. I rededicated my life to the Lord a little over a year ago, and He has taken me on a wonderful journey so far! With God's help, I quit smoking cold turkey four days after I rededicated, and talk about deliverance! No nicotine fits, no nothing except peace and better health! Hallelujah and praise His Name! I read the book "Fireproof" earlier this week, and it has really inspired me to commit to doing the Love Dare on my husband. Our marriage isn't in trouble by any means, but there is always room for improvement. I am also on a Faith Journey with the Lord, so this will be a really good opportunity for my faith to grow as I believe Him to bring my husband and I closer together through this and to bring my husband into a relationship with Him. Please keep us in your prayers. I will keep you updated!
Lisa
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